Backstabber -creek-

-Chapter 11-

Tweek's pov

While I was on the phone with Craig I stumbled into someone. That person is the most evil being alive. Even Satan is scared of him.

Eric Cartman.

Everyone knew not to mess with him or they'd be eating death. Literally. Once he was so pissed at this kid that bullied him. He made chili for this contest. He put the remains of his parents in there. Made the kid eat the grossly ugly parts of his dead parents. He thought he won, but boy was he wrong. Cartman ended up winning.

He wasn't very fond of me, but I usually stayed out of his crazy ideas. He occasionally made fun of me. Yet he never really made fun of gay people. So that was the only good quality about him. Besides him being able to manipulate anyone and everything to his advantage.

"Watch where you're going you fucking fag!" Cartman yelled at me. "Shut the fuck up you bobble head knock off!" I yelled back at him. He stood there shocked at my comment to him. "Woahhhh that was good. That doesn't mean you should be sucking off your boyfriend on call." Shit Craig's still on the phone. Surprisingly he hasn't got off yet, usually he leaves if I stop rambling or Red Racer's on. 

"What the fuck man. I'm not even dating him, nor can I even suck him off over a screen." We were just staring at each other until Cartman grabbed my phone. He tried to hang the phone near his private parts, so I couldn't reach it. He probably did this because I'm taller than him. "Whatcha gonna do now? You going to touch my dick? Because I'm the hottest man alive. Since your gay your attracted to me obviously. Then I can report you to officer Barbrady." He said in an innocent voice. He then lowered down and started talking to Craig. "Ohh hello my fellow classmate. Don't you love seeing him like this? Well you should." "Cartman get off the phone I don't want to hear your fatass." Craig stated. "Ugh no, that's boring."

Since he won't give my phone back I could just win him over. I could kick him over. Just like in Angry Birds, knock the tower over.

"Nevermind Cartman, You are the best, I'll just leave you be with Craig." I started walking back in the other direction. Then I ran back at Cartman with force and pulled down his legs. "Aaah! Stop That you fucker!" During his flailing he dropped my phone. I went over and picked it up. "Don't fuck with Cartman my ass."

"Honey, that was hot." "Craig, you didn't even see it. Also why did you call me honey? I thought you'd be drooling over the women in Florida." "Tweek, you need to loosen up. I told you I love you and that's final, nothing is going to change that." "Sure just like moving didn't change you. Ah fuck my battery is at 15% I got to go bye!" He was trying to say something, but it got cut off. 

Nothing is going right in my life. Even the gnomes are offering advice while stealing my underpants.

I was walking away from the scene I caused because it's too much pressure.

I don't want people questioning my motives on things. I just want to get home and hopefully make some treats for the shop, since those sell good. Plus my dad is all for making more cash. I also had totally forgotten about my fight with Kenny earlier. He's Cartman's friend or at least buddy. I mean they hang out with each other so there is at least that? So now I might get beaten up by the two at a later point. Go me!

At the house

Thank God I made it back home without any creeps coming to get me or gnomes.

"Sweetie, why is your shirt all wet?" I looked down and realized that I didn't have the time to cover it up with a jacket, due to me forgetting it at the shop. "I accidentally tripped because I was zoning out while walking back here." Hoping that she bought that dumb excuse. "Well alright then, but if there's anything going on you can tell me. I'm heading to the shop to help your father out, so try to get some rest. You look like a zombie with your eyebags." "I'll try tonight, but the gnomes haven't gone away yet, so I have to try to catch them again." She came to me and patted my head "You shouldn't be worried about creatures that aren't real, ok?" "But mom! They are real even Craig saw them! And Cartman, Kenny, Kyle, and Stan. You have to believe me! Aah!" I started pulling at my light hair. "Okay sure I'll believe you when pigs fly." Then she grabbed her purse and headed out towards the shop.

I went back to the comfort of my room. Where the memories of the underpants gnomes are from. I went over to my dresser and pulled out a semi clean shirt. It was a green corduroy button up. I also changed into some black waterproof shorts. In case I spilled some vanilla extract on myself. That stuff smells good, but tastes like dog shit.

After I changed I headed downstairs, grabbed my speaker and walked into the kitchen. Thankfully nobody was home so I could play my music.

I put on some songs by The Front Bottoms and got some ingredients out to make apple fritters.

After he got them done.

"Those don't look the best as Gordon Ramsay's, but they'll sell well." I wrapped them up and took them to the shop.

I walked in when this little girl and couple were ordering their drinks. "Mommy, look at those! I want one of those!" She came up to me and was pointing at the dessert. "Sir, can we order one of those or are those just displayed only?" My mom piped in "He was just about to put those out for order, so you should get them while they're hot and fresh now." I put them down on the shelves of the display and gave one of them to the little girl. "Thank you!" She yelled at me and started stuffing her face in it.

"Tweek I have something to tell you, come over here." I went over to where she was. "Since you've been doing well in the shop and at school besides looking like an outcast. I thought you might want to see an old friend. You remember Craig right? Well Christmas is coming soon so I figured it would be a perfect time for you to go to Florida and spend some time with him. It'll help you relax and detox your worries." "Are you for real?!" She nodded and smiled at me. "Does Craig know?" She shook her head and said "Only me and his mother know since I don't want you to get kidnapped and stay at a motel down there. We might also let you guys go to a theme park because that's a hot spot for those." I jumped on my mom and thanked her.

My life actually might go well.

~To be continued~
Thank you guys so much for 200+ reads!
Also I have a question for you guys

1. Should I make a Kenny x Butters story?  And if so what would you want in it?

2. What are your headcannons for any south park character/s?

Anyways thank you guys, hope you have a good rest of your week!