The Struggle Of Our Lives

Chapter 8: campfire

can't wait to eat this soup..

I finished filing down the rim of the third can and used it to stir the soup around.

I should've brought bowls or something.

Once the soup looked fully cooked, I carefully lifted the stick carrying the bucket, and slid it off, setting it on the dirt.

"Dinner's ready!" I called.

Almost immediately, the twins hopped out of the hut and waited for me to dunk the tins into the soup, and handing them off.

"Sorry we don't have any forks," I started. "You'll just have to sip it."

The twins did NOT seem to mind and quickly blew on their soups. I filled mine up and listened to the sound of the fire crackling, and the sounds of two happy little kids eating ramen.

In that moment.

For that small bit of time, I felt truly happy. Knowing that I fed the kids a real meal. Knowing I was eating real food. Knowing Trinity and Greg weren't around to beat me and John.

Oh John. I'm so sorry.

I should've done more, should have been a better daughter.

And that moment of happiness left as soon as it came. Now, as I listened to the fire, I blamed myself for everything that had happened in the past week. Fortunately, the twins didn't seem to notice.

"Can I.. never mind." Char started.

"Hey, wait, what's up?" I spun, scared she saw the state I was in.

"How much soup do we have left?" She asked.

I smiled sadly, and reached over to hug her.

"I'm not Mommy, ok? You can eat as much as you need when you're with me." I stressed. I wish I was able to make Trinity leave her alone. She fucked up my view of food, and I wish I tried harder to keep her from doing the same to Lotte.

She hugged back, and thanked me. I let go and took hold of her tin to refill it. We had tons of soup, plus the "bowls" were really small, so I expected them to have seconds and thirds.

We shouldn't have any hungry kids tonight, I smiled to myself.

We eventually finished eating, and I walked the tins to the river to wash them. I came back and set them down next to the stillwarm bucket of soup. We didn't have too much left, but It'd be a nice breakfast.

Teddy and Lotte helped me gather some more leafs and we put them onto the fire. We crawled back "inside" our new home and I tucked them in, told them a story, and we went to sleep, listening to the warm fire, singing us it's lullaby.

Turns out, Lotte and Theo have a lot of things in common with me, one of which being we like the sounds of thunderstorms, and the sound of fire.

Thunderstorms...

I should get to work on the roof to our new home. We're fine without a door for now.

Tomorrow is gonna be great.