The Struggle Of Our Lives

Chapter 23: Getting Situated

I'm not sure what the name of the movie was, but Batman and Robin were in it. Unlike most superhero movies I watched, it wasn't animated and had Poison Ivy and Mr. Freeze in it. We've seen that particular movie at least a million times, but it was always nice to re-watch a classic. Eventually, our dinner was cooked, and with a potholder, I took the pan with the taters and cordon bleu out of the oven and closed the door with my hip as usual. I took out some plates and dished them out for everybody.

"Alright, now for the next order of business," I mumbled. I bought a breast pump for Lotte to use when she had to be away from Tember for long periods, like if she takes a long nap or if she's at school. It was white and gray, the size of a tissue box, with cupholders for the two bottles. Each bottle had a funnel that I learned was called a breast shield. I hadn't taken it out of its box and stuffed it under the couch.

I crouched down and pulled it out, taking care not to break my back on the way down. I took out a small pocket knife I had resting on the windowsill and cut the tape on the corners, then opened the box to take out the torture device.

At this point, the twins were both interested in what I was doing and peered over at me, wondering what I was doing. I'd finally taken it out of the box and started reading the instructions that it came with. "Is that for me?" Lotte asked, clearly disturbed by the idea of using the machine. "Yeah," I laughed. "Just for when you're too tired to nurse or when you're at school. I'm just trying to figure it out."

The two watched me intently, and soon, I figured out most of it. "Do you wanna try it?" I asked. I was exceptionally close with the twins, and they were even closer to each other. Right around the time I had given them the talk, I assured them that no part of their bodies was gross, but that they shouldn't feel pressured to show anyone. I carefully explained that If you trust someone, and know they wouldn't hurt you (such as myself, or their twin), it was always safe to be exposed, but that they don't have to show anything to anyone if they didn't want to.

Char nodded and sat up slightly. I plugged the box into a free outlet and placed an old rag onto her lap in case of leaks. There were four parts to the bottles, and after consulting the manual a few more times, I eventually got them together. Then, I plugged in the tubing from the bottles to the machine on the floor in front of the garage door. Lotte lifted her shirt, and the two of us tried figuring out how to place the bottles. Tedd was tired at this point and started to doze off.

Eventually, we got both bottles where they needed to be, and I turned on the machine. It made a small whirring noise, and the display said it was in Massage Mode. Char jolted at first, and we laughed as she described the new sensation. After a while of this, I switched the mode to Expression Mode, and milk started trickling into the bottles.

Lotte soon relaxed on the couch and realized that Teddy had already eaten his dinner and fell asleep. I plopped down in between the twins and watched the movie with my head resting on Teddy's right shoulder. Lotte and I ate our food, set our plates aside to clean later, and turned off the machine. I took the bottles and put the nipples on them before bringing them to September. She was still laying on the rainbow bean bag I had placed her on, and I gently picked her up in my arms and rocked her.

She stirred slightly, and flailed her arms around until she found my hand, and once again held my finger with all her might. I tried not to melt into a puddle as I eventually sat down on the bean bag and coaxed her with the bottle's nipple. She didn't seem interested at first, but soon accepted it and slurped up her milk. My little ball of happiness, I thought. Then I began rethinking all my plans for taking care of her. During Lotte's second trimester, Teddy gave me the idea of using a baby sling to carry Sept while I worked at Miranda's. I had asked Miranda herself about the idea, as she delightfully exclaimed that she owned one for her son Peter, who was now too large to fit into the sling.

After sharing pictures of her little boy with me, she promised to bring the sling and other baby supplies to work the next morning for me to have. As we hugged, I thanked her repeatedly for her kindness and assured her I'd keep working hard at the store, before she berated me and told me to take care of myself, first and foremost. The next morning, she ended up giving me several cloth bags full of diapers, pacifiers, baby wipes, stuffed animals, and the baby sling. I was nearly brought to tears at her thoughtfulness and again thanked her for her generosity.

As I continued thinking over the plans I made, I also thought about money. I knew I needed another job, even though I'd taken more hours at the bar, and considered a different approach to earning money.

At that moment, I got a notification from Instagram.

Yasmin_MN: "Hey Terry!  How are you?" 

I smiled and picked up my phone to answer. We made small talk for about an hour or so, before we agreed to talk in the morning. I got up to put Teddy up in the loft bed, then noticed Lotte had fallen asleep, then carried her to her room and tucked her in before going back for Tember and repeating the process. I finally got back to the garage and climbed up into the bed next to Teddy. 

Things are gonna work out, I just know it.