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❝She hates me but not as much as I love her. ❞
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It's been three months. Three months since you left the BAU to protect the ones you love but to protect the person you care most for. Three months since you left the love of your life in tears and in the dark. Fuck. You can't imagine what she must be going through or think about you right now. She must hate you for the way you just upped and left.
You look at yourself in the mirror, you've lost a lot of weight since you've left the BAU. You look down to your sleeves and roll them up to see if that would help your outfit look a little better. It didn't. It just showed more of your scars to the world. Yeah, that's going back down.
"Still don't know what to wear?"
You turn around and look at Nia. She walks over to you and fixes your collar. "No, I think I'm going to go with this shirt. I was debating on rolling my sleeves up but I don't think that's a good idea." You say as you look at the beautiful woman before you. She gives you a small smile as she continues to fix your shirt.
"Nervous?" You give her a nod with a sigh. "Don't be. I'm sure they'll be happy to know you're alive and not laying in a ditch somewhere dead." She jokes.
You didn't give her joke attention. Even though she was joking, that's how she found you. Laying in a ditch almost dead. That was almost a week ago, even though you've been cleared by the doctors, you still feel pain in your abdomen where you got hurt.
"She'll understand, right?"
Nia looks at you with a sincere face. "I don't know. I hope so." You look down as she backs away from you and sits on her bed facing you. You turn around and look at yourself in the mirror again. "Are you going to tell them what really happened and why you disappeared?" You stop what you're doing and look at her through the mirror. "You atleast have to tell her."
You shake your hand and run your hand through your hair. "No. No. That's not happening." You turn back around and grab your blazer. "Hotch is the only person who really knows why left. I plan to keep it that way." You say as you put it on.
"She needs to know why you left her."
"No." You argue back. "Not happening."
"Y/N."
You place your hands on your waist. "Nia."
"If you love her, you have to tell her."
"No. Don't do that." You say as you begin to pace back and forth in the room. "I'm protecting her. I don't want her to know what happened."
"Okay." Nia simply says before looking down at her watch. "You're going to be late." You nod as you reach to the nightstand beside you and grab your coffee cup. "You need to go. It'll all be okay. You got this."
