i wish || kim mingyu ✓

9

“I look at myself, who is left staring blankly alone”

The sound of jazz and grinding coffee was music to Yeju's ear; and the scent of caffeine was one of her nose's favored smell. “Yeju, at last!” One of her writer buddy, Seohye, signaled her to their usual table. Seohye was seated on the table alone, they were quite early.

Every Saturday afternoon, their little club — consisting seven members —occupied the large table at the cafe near the school Yeju works at. Yeju considered herself lucky for being in this club, where they would synthesize each other's ideas, plots and thoughts. Or they would discuss the struggle of balancing responsibilities and their passion for writing.

“Yeju, I have great news!” Seohye released her excitement through tapping her heels on the polished concrete floor. “I've been dying to announce it to you last week, alone and in person. However, unfortunately, you weren't here.”

“My schedule was jammed pack last week.” An exasperated breath escaped from Yeju's lips just by the thought of it. Her friend's excitement gradually managed to spread to Yeju, the thought dispersing.

“My sister, Seohyun, she quits being a writer and became an agent at a publishing company. She's also searching for someone to pass her knowledge onto.” She took a sip of her cold matcha latte.

“You're her sister, she could mentor you and be your agent!”

“She did offer to be her mentee, but I declined.” Seohye shrugged nonchalantly. “I mentioned the members of our club to her instead. She liked you the most. Your ideas thrilled her.” She flashed a cashmere cat grin.

Yeju's heart pumped with excitement. A rush of adrenaline pumped through her blood stream, itching her to get up and dance around the cafe. Regardless of how delighted she was, she pushed it down. “Me? Why not you?”

“I prefer to conquer the writing world without the help of my sister who's an author of a best-selling book. You know how prideful I am.”

While Seohye took another sip of her latte, Yeju's head was up in the clouds. She considered on self-publishing, but an opportunity such as this was way better. She visioned her story would be placed on shelves in bookstores and libraries. Her dreams were coming into fruition!

Seohye cleared her throat, dragging Yeju's head back to reality. “I nearly forgot to mention the important part.” The latter inched closer, all ears. “You guys would be travelling frequently as she mentors you. She'll pay for the flight tickets and the hotel-”

“H-how frequent?”

“She stated that perhaps you guys would stay at a country for months and move to another for a few years. She said a broad experience is great for a writer.” Yeju's heart sank, her stomach twisted into a knot. “Of course if it's Christmas or New Years or a relatives birthday, you would be coming here to Korea to attend the celebration.”

Seohye caught up with Yeju's now solemn expression, the enthusiasm gone. “I know leaving your loved ones isn't a piece of cake. You have two days. And I hope whatever your decision is, it wouldn't be regretted.”

Iseul — one of the members in their little club — entered the cafe. Seohye diverted her gaze to Iseul and waved, meanwhile Yeju gaped at her reflection on the huge mirror, staring blankly and drowning in her thoughts.

“Oh, and don't tell the others about this.” Seohye swiftly whispered before running to embrace Iseul.

•

The girl dragged herself home with her mind up in space, her train of thoughts incessantly tossing more thoughts to the other pile of unsolved thoughts. She couldn't divert her attention from the offer — a huge steppingstone. Her mind wasn't present. Her members' words went in her ear and out of the other. On her way home, she bumped into at least six people's shoulder.

By the time she entered their apartment, it was empty. Mingyu was out for groceries. She sat on the couch, gawked at the black TV screen and listened to the clock ticking, waiting for Mingyu.

With the help of her thoughts gnawing her mind, time ticked rapidly. Mingyu bursted through the door with bags of groceries that'll last them perhaps a week. “Groceries!” Yeju's gaze was still on the blank screen, unresponsive.

“Groceries!” The boy struggling with the bags called again, voice coated with worry. Again, unresponsive. A bag slipped off his hand. “Ju, I need help!” cried the boy. Yeju sprung up from the couch and ran to the struggling boy.

“I'm sorry! There's a lot in my mind right now.” She huffed and grabbed the bags off of his grip.

“You staring at the blank screen and not being responsive was a big sign.” Mingyu trailed behind Yeju. They dropped the groceries on the kitchen island and their eyes met. Mingyu could see her eyebrows slightly furrowed, eyes coated with worry — it's a sign that something big must be bugging her mind.

“Would you like to talk about it, hmm?” He gingerly rubbed her shoulder.

“Well...” Yeju trailed as she attempted to untangle her long string of thoughts and form it into a comprehensible sentence. As soon as her thoughts were more in order, she unfolded every thought in her mind.

Mingyu listened attentively to every word that comes out of her mouth. As she reveals more of her thoughts, the more relieve she felt and her mind felt tidier.

“After telling you, I decided upon not to take it,” Yeju stated, a bit of hesitation hinted in her voice. Mingyu didn't say anything. He was chewing on his bottom lip and chin rested on his palms, deep in thought.

“You can take it if you want to,” he finally spoke.

“B-but all of my loved ones are here, all of my memories are here!” She exclaimed. “And you're here...”

“And you can't throw all your dreams out of the window.” He smiled faintly. “You've been dreaming about this since...forever!”

“But... I'll be leaving you.” She said shakily. Her lips were quivering and tears began to pool her eyes.

“Hey, it's not like we're gonna call it off. We'll make it work.” He wrapped his arms around her. Yeju buried her face on his torso and sobs were heard. “You were having a hard time to decide. That means part of you wants it, don't you?”

He felt her nod on his chest reluctantly.

“So call or text Seohye that you'll be accepting it.” He broke the hug and stared at her face, salty substances streaming down her cheeks. “And we'll spend our remaining time together and save those tears for when the day actually comes.” Mingyu planted a kiss on her forehead.

•

Mingyu watched her back getting closer and closer to the gate with a blurred vision due to his tears. Don't look back. Don't look back. Don't... He chanted inwardly. Helping her pack was difficult enough for him.

Despite his constant chants, she did look back. Her wet and reddish cheeks tugged up. A radiant yet sad smile as she waved before entering the gate. Mingyu returned the smile granted that she didn't see it.

Pushing Yeju to grab the opportunity wasn't tough, being the one to push her as her boyfriend was. He heard the reluctancy when Yeju “declared” to turn down the offer. In exchange for the offer, their relationship is now long distanced.

As long as they were together, Mingyu was fine with it. He's happy as long as she's happy.

“Sir, excuse me.” A woman tapped his shoulder. “You're extremely good-looking even when you're crying, you could audition to be one of our models.” The woman handed Mingyu a calling card ‘UAA Ent.’ written on the top left.

“I hope to see you in the auditions.” The woman walked away after flashing a warm grin and left Mingyu blankly staring at the calling card.

°

hope yall like it! cause of late updates : school </3