Logan's Tribrid

14.

Tw: self harm again, this time more detail towards the end. I'm sorry if this triggers u.

Willow's POV:

Logan helped me paint the rest of the room. The walls were red, the ceiling was grey with LED lights around it and the floor was hard wood.

Me and the boys, other than Wrath, moved my furniture in here and I just moved it to how I wanted it. (Pic above)

They all left to go eat dinner but I still wasn't gungey so I just went back to the guest room and grabbed all of my clothes and toiletries. I rearranged my bathroom how I liked it and changed the counter surface along with the wallpapers.

Now, the counter was a dark red marble design and so were the walls. It was red mixed with grey. The shower was grey and all of my decor was also grey and red. All of my toiletries were either on a shelf or under the sink. Other than soap and a singular hand towel that was hanging on the wall. The toilet seat was red and I had a grey hamper by the door. (You'll have to imagine, couldn't find a pic)

My walk in closet was full of clothes and shoes I had bought recently along with some bags and accessories. The whole walk in closet was also a light grey color and the shelves were red.

I was proud of how my room looked as I went and laid on my bed. 'I know my tongue felt weird on Logan's dick' I heard Kila talk in my head.

'Mhm. That's why I didn't want you sucking his dick. You know we have burn and cut scars on there, of course it felt weird.'

'He still moaned and groaned and most importantly, finished.'

I rolled my eyes before exiting my room and walking to the kitchen to grab an apple and a water.

"You smell heavily of Logan." I turn around to face Rage as I grabbed an apple.

"Yeah, we'll we hugged."

"Mhm. And that's a lot of red paint on your chest for it to have been an accident."

"Well, I do smell like Logan, what do you think is under the paint, Rage?"

I look down at my clothes to see I had red paint all over before silently walking back upstairs.

I ate my apple and drank my water as I played music of the TV, that also had LED lights around it.

When I finished, I changed into workout clothes and walked around the house until I saw a gym room that had all of the equipment that you could ever think of.

I got on the treadmill and turned it up to 90mph and put my headphones in as I ran.

I ran for 2 hours, occasionally adjusting the speed to fit my momentary exhaustion. I walked over to the punching bags and went at them, expressing all of my repressed anger. Anger that I didn't even realize was there until just now.

I thought of Joshua for assaulting me. And William all the he's done. And Williams men for helping him. And Kila for sucking our mates dick, knowing good and well that I hated doing that shot because of how damaged my tongue is.

And William again for making my whole family think that I was dead. And Rage for torturing me even though I understand why he did it.

And lastly, myself. For self harming. For scaring Wrath. For not being stronger and allowing myself to be kidnapped. For being distant and hurting my family. For killing my twins mate even though I had good reasoning.

My knuckles bled from hitting the bag so many times, so hard. But I didn't care. I deserved to be able to let my anger out and that's exactly what I was doing.

Tears started streaming down my face as I hit the bag before grabbing hold of it and dropping to my knees. I got the bag with the palm of my hand as I screamed out in mental agony.

"Why! Why why why!!"

Sobs echoed through the gym but I couldn't stop it. I saw my knuckles begin to heal up and it made me want to do it all over again so I closed my eyes and chanted a spell in my head that stops myself from healing so quickly.

As psychotic as it sounds, at times like this I enjoy seeing the blood drip down my hands. I enjoy seeing the rips in my knuckles. It reminds me that I got what I deserved. Pain.

"Pain. That's all you'll ever deserve. It's all you'll ever need. As long as your in physical pain, the mental pain disappears."

Punch. Right to the nose. "Doesn't seeing that blood drip from your face bring you a sence of calmness." He held a mirror to my face. And as horrible as it was for a 9 year old, I believed him. The blood did calm me. Because like he's been saying for a year now, I deserve this. And turning the mental pain into physical pain, puts my mind at ease.

I come back to reality as someone shakes me, holding into my shoulders. I didn't even take a second to see who it was before I punch them right in the nose and bring my knee up, kneeing then in the jaw.

When I see Lucifer's face, it immediately morphs into an all too familiar blond hair, blue eyed mother fucker who originally took me from my family.

I scream as loud as my lungs allow me to before standing as fast as possible and sprinting to my room.

I lock my door along with any windows in my room. I run to the shower and turn the water as hot as it'll go and strip before getting in.

I bib every inch of my body as hard as I can and continue my sobs. All I can feel is his disgusting hands on my body.

I grab my razor and break it before running it along my wrist in horizontal directions. I burst out into hysterical laughter as I watch the blood drip down my arms and into the steaming hot water, tears still streaming down my face.

They burnt as the water ran over them and when My mental episode ended I stepped out of the shower and put on my pajama set before going to sleep.