A Tale of Two Archers [Abandoned]

Chapter 1

"Seriously though, why do you use swords when you're an Archer? That's not how things are supposed to work."

"Sigh Because I use my weapons as projectiles. Hence why I'm an Archer."

"But you're always close combat..."

"Quiet. Besides, don't you launch a planet as your Noble Phantasm."

"Well yeah, but I also use my bow for that."

"Hmph... Just stop bothering me while I'm busy." Archer looked back at the Goddess with a smirk as he cleaned. "What's got you interested in me all of the sudden Goddess?" He began cleaning again.

"Me? Interested? What makes you say that?" Ishtar tried to deny it, looking away from the Bowman.

"It's easy to understand you, I already know regardless. But I'm afraid I cannot hang out at the current moment, I'm a bit busy as you can see."

"You truly are a 'Servant' aren't you Emiya-Kun~?" Asked Ishtar with a smug tone. "You act more like a Servant than a hero."

"Everyone has side hobbies. Keeping the place clean so happens to be mine."

"As expected of you, you always were quite the butler." Ishtar sighed. "U-Um... Not that I know of that is."

"Of course, you'd know. You're Rin after all." Archer winked.

"So what is it that you do besides cleaning?"

"Hmm. For the most part, I spend my days working in the cafeteria, mainly as the head chef. Afterward, I either clean or just mess around and clean my gear as well."

"You clean your weapons...?" Ishtar raised a brow at the man.

"I got an unlimited amount to clean. If not, they'll get rusty." Joked the man. "On a serious note, it's a way to pass time. So long as it keeps me busy, that's all that matters honestly."

"Is there nothing else that you do?"

"What kind of food do you like?"

"What do you think about Zelretch?"

The questions went on as Ishtar followed Archer around the place, wherever he goes, he was trailed by her as he continues to clean. Without batting an eye at her, he answers her questions with ease. Unbothered by the fact that she's distracting him, given he's able to multitask in a conversation while also cleaning.

-~-

"What do I think of Ishtar? Just what are you about Faker?" Gilgamesh (Caster) snorted at Archer.

"It's a simple question honestly. I see no reason to why you think I have a motive." Archer said as he looked at the King of Heroes.

"Well, there's much into consideration on what I think of the Goddess of Venus. Why has she interested you? If anything, I would advise you to stay away from her. She's nothing but bad luck and causes trouble everywhere she goes." Gilgamesh (Caster).

"So, I take it you don't like her."

"Hmph. Such a weak statement. I despise her. But if you must know, that Useless Goddess seemed to have changed when inheriting the human mage she's possessing."

"Really now?"

"Mm." Gilgamesh (Caster) nodded at Archer. "If anything, I say it was a good factor that she inherited the body of the girl, it changed her personality and everything a bit. Although that does not stop me from despising her for all she's done. Overall, she's changed from the stuck-up whore she was, to something far better."

"So before, she was worse huh?" Archer pondered and put a hand to his chin in thought. Suddenly, he's glad Rin influenced Ishtar... He doesn't know what kind of monster he'd been dealing with. Then again, she probably wouldn't take interest in him or speak to him if she didn't inherit Rin.

"What's your connection to the human mage anyway? I suspect the girl that the Useless Goddess is harboring is someone special towards you, Faker."

"Oh you know, we were simply acquaintances in the past. There's nothing else to say. We just supported one another, there's not much of a connection. I just knew her, that's all."

"I suspect this is why you asked me about my thoughts of Ishtar..." Gilgamesh (Caster) said with a hum. "Given you realize that she's in control, I take it you wondered what kind of person Ishtar is due to the girl?"

"Your wisdom knows no bound King of Heroes." Archer smirked as he nodded. "I was just curious what kind of person she was, to think that she was unlucky in being possessed by a Goddess... Truly, her life is just full of misfortunes." He found himself amused.

"Anyone would be unlucky enough to be possessed by that woman. Seriously... Unless we were in any other circumstances, I would have wiped her from this world."

"I can see that happening..." Archer mumbled as he sweats nervously. "Then again, she and Enkidu seem to always be at each other's throats."

"Because both cannot stand one another. Besides... It's usually her who starts those battles, she has it coming when she gets attacked."

-~-

"Ow! Careful where you touch."

"Sigh This is being careful. Besides... You had it coming for instigating."

"He started it..."

"Yeah, after you insulted him." Archer looked at Ishtar with a blank look. She has bandages around her as he finished patching her up. Speaking of his earlier conversation about both the Goddess and the Chains of Heaven, it seems both got into another fight.

Sigh

"You're supposed to be defending me."

"That'll just be biased. I saw the whole thing, you should watch that mouth of yours really, it's the reason why you get into many fights. You're quite the troublesome piece of work." Smirked Archer.

"Hmph! I'm not troublesome at all. It's everyone who is!"

"Egoistic as always." Hummed Archer with a smile. "Speaking of which, what would like? Dinner time is almost nearing in, everyone would rush into here shortly."

"Especially the King of Knights..." Ishtar huffed. "Honestly, I'm still in awe at how much they can all eat. How do you deal with them Emiya-Kun?"

"I'm hanging by a thread each time. Trust me, feeding one is hard enough as it is. Now imagine feeding multiple mouths?"

"The cafeteria staff truly has it the hardest than everyone."

"..."

"Can we have tea again...?" Ishtar asked.

"I'll get to it—"

"Not like that!"

"...?" Archer raised a brow at her in confusion. Then he saw a blush form on her face.

"I... I mean just with the two of us?"

"As you wish Goddess Ishtar." Chuckled Archer.

"... I-Idiot... It's not funny." Ishtar weakly replied.

"Well, I'm sorry then. I cannot help myself. Your reactions are simply pathetic to look at. I can't help but find them hilarious." Grinned the Bowman.

SLAP

"O-Ow! Oi! The hell are you doing?!" Archer grabbed his cheek and looked at Ishtar.

"Y-You're despicable! Go to hell, Emiya-Kun!"

"Trust me... Already there." Archer replied bluntly. "I'll get the tea ready, you just hang on tight. I'll be with you, shortly."

"..." Ishtar watched his figure walk away once again from her, as she watched him leave into the kitchen, the blush remained on her face.

He really does know how to make her feel certain ways... Especially embarrassment.

-~-

Word Count:  1,191