upon our land • s. kalivoda

three

"i can't find my keys."

"come on, the ambulance." kate says.

-------

"we should not be this close to a police station if we are in a stolen ambulance." simon says.

"that's the whole point, we're hiding in plain sight," i argue.

"yeah, just like bundy." josh adds. we all look over at him in a confusion of many different things. "ted bundy when he was stalking his victims, i mean."

"didn't he get caught?" kate asks since it was quite clear.

"we'll, yeah. but- no that's not the point-"

"I'm gonna go take a leak." simon says.

"shouldn't go alone, i'll come with." i grab his hand and we walk to an empty road.

-------

"don't look," he says.

"i'll try not to," i wink while lighting another cigarette. a cop car came blaring by and scared the both of us. "what the hell?"

"tatum?"

"what's up?"' i say, putting my cig out.

"i know how hard it is for you to let people in and stuff but i was thinking we could like.. go on a date somewhere? when this is all over. we're practically dating anyway. i don't want to pressure you though." he continued rambling and i just smiled at how nervous he was. he was adorable.

"simon?"'

"yeah?" he asked with hopeful eyes.

"i would love to." i grinned cheekily, this was the best moment ever. i couldn't wait for this to be over. he abruptly stepped forward and pressed his lips against mine. but of course, moment ruined. we heard some girl singing a song, old sounding.

'you always hurt the one you love'

'the one you shouldn't hurt at all'

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i was treating the cut on my ankle and neck, simon his ankle only. i understood why he couldn't help me, i'm not mad. my ankle was sliced as well, i could barely walk. my neck was hardly a scratch, though. i hiss from the hydrogen peroxide and grab simon's hand, squeezing it for a few seconds.

the rest were in the kitchen with us, kate getting tylenol for our cuts.

"here," she says to simon and i.

"thank you," we say before dry swallowing the pills.

"it doesn't make sense, it's not possible. bullets didn't stop her!" sam says, voice full of worry. sam annoys me to the core, she broke deena's heart when she moved. she knows deena is sensitive right now and is waltzing back into her life because it's easy in her fragile state. but that is beside the point.

"amazing observation," i know kate felt the same way i did.

"who the hell was that?" deena asks frantically.

"how the hell should i know, the bitch seemed normal!" i yell. i hate to be the bearer of bad news but deena was just as bad as sam. she could be selfish too. we all have our moments but, boy did she have a lot. deena has been my best friend for years, though, so i can't let a little selfishness ruin that.

"well, i hate to break it to you, but normal bitches don't bleed black fucking blood!" she spits back and i roll my eyes. quite obvious.

"my therapist is familiar with you." but that goes unheard. for the best.

"well she seemed scared! and normal! until she attacked us with a fucking razor blade!" simon yells and i nod with him.

"wait. a razor?' josh inquires.

"yeah for old-timey shaving, or-or in this case i guess slitting her-"

"wrists. she slashed her wrists."

"ha! twins," i say, and everyone looks at me like i'm crazy. "what?"

--------

"this is ruby lane, the girl who attacked you." josh says while showing us a picture of her. she was so pretty.

"shit." i take a closer look and show simon the paper. it was her. i was closely examining and reading before something caught my attention.

"because it happened 30 years ago! 1965." i look up at him.

"so a dead girl just tried to kill the both of us? okay, yeah. sounds about right." i get up and walk to the bathroom, making sure nobody is following me. i grab a towel, some hydrogen peroxide and turn on the sink. this wasn't some dramatic thing, i just didn't want anyone to think i was doing it again.

i run my wrist under the water before soaking a small portion of the towel in hydrogen peroxide and putting it on the cut. i'm surprised nobody had noticed, it was right in the open. i hiss at the pain but still hold it while getting a bandage and wrap. after finally fixing it up i turn around and simon is standing there.

"heyyyy," i shoot mini finger guns at him. "let's get back out there, what did i miss?"

"did you do that? are-are you doing it again?" he asks abruptly, head looking down. my eyes start to water as i hate simon being disappointed in me. or anyone, for that matter. seeing simon sad was so rare (in public, at least. we had had our fair share of crying in each other's arms.) so i was worried.

"no, of course not. i've tried really hard not to, i wouldn't throw that away. when ruby was bringing the knife up to my neck she got my wrists. i promise you i wouldn't." he sighed in relief and i walked up and hugged im.

"i'm-i''m sorry i was just worried you were doing it again," he says into my hair.

"no it's fine, i get it. and don't worry when this is all over i will never even think about doing it again because we will be together." we pull away and he smiles and nods.

"how bad does it hurt?"

"not as bad after i cleaned it."

"okay." he grabs my hand and we walk back out to the others. and i was so close to saying what was really on my mind.

'i love you.'

simon's pov

i was so close to saying those three words on my mind when i thought she was in pain yet again.

'i love you.'