Mollie + Chester

Chapter Twenty

A loud knock echoed through the house and I paused my movie right in the middle of the part where the main character was going to get pushed off the cliff so he was kinda flying in mid-air, waiting for me to press play so his life can continue.
"Seth!" I called, "get the door!"
"You get it Mollie," Mum yelled through the kitchen. She was probably making some nice and expensive lunch with not frozen peas to bring to her next Big Nose Society meeting. "Seth's out!"
I wandered where Seth was, I mean he never really went out. Maybe he was finally becoming normal and I could be a normal little sister who he bribed when he didn't want me to tell Mum on him. I was being deprived of being rich because Seth was abnormal.
"Where is he?" I asked jumping off the couch.
"He went out with a girl called Lacy or Casey or..."
"Macy!" I finished for her. "Seth is out on a..." I pulled the door open and stopped when I saw the three people who stood on the front step.
The man and the woman who were in front towered over me and wore blue uniforms that looked much nicer than the only policeman in our town had. The man bent down, kneeling on his knee so he was almost my height and looked at me like I was a little kid.
"Is your mummy or daddy home?" He asked and I suppressed an eye roll. I was not six!
"Mum!" I yelled so loud the man who was kneeling down grimaced and held his ear. I smiled sweetly as Mum came rushing in.
"Oh, what is it?" She asked looking at the police officers with a look holding more worry than usual.
The third person was familiar, a lady with jet black hair and pretty face, only this time her cheeks were wet with tears.
"Xia," I said recognising the nurse who was called when Mum couldn't coax me out of my bed. "The lady with the 'hero' name.
"Can we go into the other room and watch TV?" She asked and I looked at her suspiciously but agreed when Mum nodded at me.
Unpausing the TV, I jumped onto the couch next to Xia, straining my ears to hear what was going on in the next room.
"So Mollie, what movie are we watching sweetheart?" Xia asked. The cartoon character had fallen off the cliff but just as he was about to hit the ground, a giant bird grabbed him with its claws and carried him to its nest. Now he had the problem of getting out of being food for the giant bird's baby who snapped its beak hungrily at him.
"We regret to inform you..." I heard from the other room. Xia took the remote gently out of my hand and turned up the TV so it was harder to hear Mum talking.
"...your son was..."
"Sweetheart... Look at me." Xia tried to take my hands but I pulled away from her.
"...being taken in an ambulance..."
Millions of thoughts ran through my mind as if they were on fast forward. I jumped off the couch again, Xia calling me back and I stood in the door to the hall, breathing hard.
"Did the ambulance have the siren on?" I asked biting my lip so hard I could taste blood. The woman police officer looked down at the ground and the man moved his head slightly to the left then back.
I knew enough about ambulances having ridden in them too many times to count, to know that when the siren was off, there was no hope.
Mum's legs collapsed under her and she bent over as if she was in pain, wailing and holding onto her head. Dad, who had apparently emerged from his study stood frozen not looking at anything biting his lip like me. We both did it when we were trying to process information.
I could feel hot salty tears on my cheeks running into my mouth and I started shaking. My mouth felt as though it was filled with blood and my chest tightened, ready for a coughing fit. I gasped, trying to breathe but feeling like I was drowning. The water seemed to grow above my head, making it impossible to reach the surface again.
It's a dream, I told myself over and over. It's a dream, I will wake up and Seth will be there telling me not to worry about the future. Seth will be there like he is every day.
Xia came up behind me and held onto my shoulders, turning me away from my hysterical mother and back to the couch again. I heard a wailing sound in the room and she said; "it's okay." I realised I was the one wailing.
"Seth!" I called leaning over, my head tucked on my knees. I felt something soft rub against my leg and through my tear filled eyes I found Chester staring at me with his big green eyes.
I lifted my kitten onto my lap and squeezed him tight. Memories of Seth rushed through my mind, overlapping and combining together until they were a constant blur of colour. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to block out the world.
I remembered one time when I was younger, maybe seven or eight, I had sneaked into Seth's room and found his diary, or as he called it; his notebook. I opened it to a random page knowing he would be back soon and I would only get to read one or two entries and I quickly read his scrawly handwriting:
She's going back tomorrow for them to see how she is but I know it won't be good. She has no energy really and she never smiles anymore. I know that I should stop looking into the future, something unexpected could happen, but I don't think this is preventable.
There's really nothing else to do. I wish there was that magical cure, just like everyone who has known someone with cancer or had cancer, but I know that cure is most likely not going to happen.
You know, at school one day when I was younger and Mollie had just been diagnosed we were doing probability at school in maths. The teacher asked us to write down something that will definitely happen, most likely to happen, and would never happen.
Most kids wrote I will definitely watch TV tonight, I will least likely go overseas tomorrow, I will never see a purple giraffe in a clown costume.
I wrote they will definitely find a cure for Mollie since I was very optimistic back then.
The teacher came by and looked down at my work, smiling in that pitiful way like everyone does.
Now if I had to write down one again, I would say... It would definitely hurt when she died.
But I guess I'd rather feel the pain of losing a sister than have her feel the pain of losing a brother because I know how bad it would be.
Now I realised what pain he was talking about, and why he was glad I wouldn't have to feel it. I made my hands fists and my nails dug eight tiny lines into my palms that started bleeding, the sharp pain feeling better and more bearable than the deep pain inside.
Xia took my hands and smoothed out my fingers, holding tissues to the bleeding lines. She was crouched on the floor next to me, not saying anything anymore because she knew her words would not make this better. There was only one thing that would make this better.
I whispered his name one more time in last hope to bring him back.
"Seth."