Chapter 1

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Cold air bites my skin as I'm jogging around in the streets at 06:00 in the morning. I seem to enjoy jogging this early, 'cause it's the only time everything seems truely peaceful. It also helps me clear my head from every little thing that decides to fuck with my stress levels. It's the only way I can seem to relax and leave all the bullshit behind me and start a fresh and clean day. With the sun starting to rise, people start their usual routines for the day ahead. Music blaring through my headphones, I decide to head home for a long and hot refreshing shower.

I don't really keep track of where I'm going since I know the way back home like the back of my hand so I just concentrate on my breathing and my strides while sweat is rolling down my forehead and back, sticking my top to my back. I didn't even notice the big black van that was following me home, that's how hard i concentrate to keep my breathing under control, otherwise weird shit starts to happen and I can't afford that. I promised John that I won't ever lose control and I plan on keeping that promise.

I jog down the driveway straight to the front door, where I finally stop to catch my breath before entering the house. Shutting the door close with my foot, I pull my headphones off and unplug them from my phone before returning my phone back into my bra (Hey, don't judge, okay? It's the safest place to hide small stuff. Money included. And if anyone dares play touchy touch, they've got a thing coming for them). With my headphones still my hand, I walk through the hall shouting:" Ma, I'm home!" as I set my headphones down on the coffee table.

"I'm in the kitchen, sweetie!" She calls back. Smelling the bacon and eggs, I make a beeline for the kitchen. Moms are the best cooks ever. Don't let anyone tell you any differently. Honest to god. She usually leaves me wanting more.
"Mmmmh, it smells good, Ma." I tell her as I pass by her, kissing her on the cheek. I open the fridge and grab a bottle of water and a can of soda( Yeah, I know. It's a weird combo for breakfast, but I need the carbs 'cause i usually just burn through it. And i don't mean exercise, I literally have a metabolism so fast that my body just burns through everything I eat.), and go sit at the kithen island where a huge plate of food is already waiting for me.

"Thanks, Ma. It looks amazing," I say, already biting into a piece of bacon.
"It's a pleasure, Nay-Nay," she says. "What are your plans for today, Nay-Nay?"
"I don't know yet, Ma. You know i don't plan ahead, 'cause nothing ever works out the way I plan, but I was thinking of taking Rover for a walk around the park later." Rover is, was, my brother's dog. He's a mix between a husky and a german shepperd and he's a very loyal companion. He's also an ex-millitary dog, meaning he went through the toughest training a dog can go through and luckily for me I got to keep him, 'cause he won't listen to any other person but me. No one knows why he only listens to me but my brother's buddies from the army thinks that because I am related to John and he can sense it, he'll only listen to me. And everytime someone tries to go near him without me, well lets just say they come back with a lot of bite marks. Suddenly overcome with sadness I push my plate away. John died during an ambush bombing on his unit back in Iraq.

As if sensing my somber mood, mom pulls me into a hug and tears wells up in my eyes. "It's going to be alright, Nay-Nay. You'll see. I miss him too." She whispers in my ear comfortingly.
"I know, Ma. I just can't help it. It's been a year and it still hurts as if it happened yesterday," I say sobbing. Everything has been so hard since John died. I lost my best friend and brother that day and no one can come close to that. No one will ever beat his silly jokes or his crazy ass pranks. Everytime he was home we had the craziest pranks that could drive my mother so crazy sometimes that she would kick us out of the house saying that if we wanted to prank each other so badly we could go and do it in the woods and not to come back unless the prank war has stopped.

In the end we would usually come home looking like we faught with a grizzly and she would just burst out in laughter at how silly we looked.
"I know, sweety. I know. Listen, why don't you go and take a shower then afterwards we can both take Rover out for a walk, okay?" She askes, taking my face in between her hands and wiping my tears away with her thumbs. I give her a shaky nod and turned to go upstairs. Taking the stairs up two at a time, I enter my room and grab my toiletries and clothes to take to the bathroom. Just as I reach my door I get a very off feeling and then my gut suddenly tells me to be extra careful. So I turn back to my room and leave my clothes on my bed, 'cause i won't need those type of clothes anyway, and grab my black tank top, camo pants, sports bra and combat boots.

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