Shoot Your Shot

Setenta y cuatro - 74

Big Lex💘: Poookieeee! Oh my gosh I'm sorry again but the flight is cancelled because they are trying to get the runway cleared for take off! I'll let you know if anything changes. I miss you so much and I really just want to go home 😭I love you and I really really need a Lizzie cuddle when we get back.

Frowning, I look at the text again. This the second time Lexi flight got delayed today and it stinks.

Me: It's ok!!!!! My cuddles are always welcome and I have a box of wine waiting for you! I love you and miss you too! Can't wait to see you.

Pressing send, i place my phone back down on the table. Twisting my lips, I see her sending a heart emoji and kissing face emoji. I deeply sigh and keep reading on stroke protocols in the hospital setting, although my brain keeps going back to Alexis.

Is it okay to be mad at your best friend?

Maybe I'm just overreacting?

I feel really guilty about being upset, but I can't help it. I am. Last night, we had an emergency Jacaro household meeting over facetime because Lexi announced that she and Stephen broke up.

I know that I should focus on how she is feeling but... She told me that she wasn't going to do it now, during the tournament, but she did..

She didn't listen to me...

She lied to me.

That hurts.

I know I've told little white lies to get candy or maybe have dessert before dinner but I have never lied to Lexi about anything serious, especially anything that affects someone else, because I knew it would only hurt everybody at the end. As many times as I've struggled to communicate how I feel, I have always been honest and up front with her and Maxine.

Sometimes I feel like they shelter me way too much the way my parents did. I'm their friend, not their kid.

My shoulders tense up, thinking about the amount of times they have shared things more in detail with each other than with me. I know I shouldn't hold things like that over their heads because they could do the same but how is it fair?

I'm really trying to look on her side of things and where she is coming from, but it's hard. It's especially hard because Jaylan canceled our call last night because the team went out for tattoos. He said it was sold as a team bonding event but really they went because Hollis is heartbroken.

It's a sad situation. My brain doesn't understand and my heart hurts for both of them.

I mean, Lexi has come so far in finding herself and she has done so great the last year I think with just truly doing what she wants and not whatever everybody else wants. I just wish she would have expressed what she felt when she told me before she left.

She was vague and I just feel right now our friendship doesn't matter. I know my reasons for trying to change her mind were selfish but I'm just trying to think of Stephen's side of things.