The Gilded Cage - Taking my Place

Courting

"Are you quite warm enough, Miss Scott-Montague? I really do think it might snow?" Steven Blackstone enquired, sweetly concerned for me as we walked towards the park, side by side on the smooth pavement. He was wearing a parka, complete with a faux fur trim around the large hood, on top of a suit, and a beanie hat of all things. I was dressed in a DiMarco gown, and a heavy cloak, which Miss Knight had fastened in place, neck to toe. I was as warm as toast, but struggling to catch my breath as my corset was laced so tight my ribcage was creaking.

"Snow at Christmas would be wonderful...don't you think, Mr Blackstone? And I am warm enough...my grandmama would never let me out, otherwise?"

"She is a remarkable woman...extremely direct..."

"Does she scare you?" I laughed, turning to look him in the eye. My coalscuttle bonnet made it hard to look at him, but turning meant that my cloak and skirts swirled dramatically around me, which Miss Knight had suggested was quite romantic. I was getting better at managing my attire, and she was teasing me about my efforts. She made me work hard, and she was a tough taskmaster, but she had a wicked sense of humour.

"Oh, yes...definitely...I am used to my mother...she is a strong character, as I think you are aware, in normal circumstances...but Mrs Catriona Montague is a true force of nature...she is absolutely terrifying!"

"She is actually an old softie...as long as you behave..."

"I am sure that you are the perfect granddaughter, Miss Scott-Montague..."

"Hardly...I am hopelessly inexperienced and almost entirely uneducated in the doctrine...but I am learning...I hope, Mr Blackstone?" I said, facing forwards again, walking on, feeling quite light-headed. He stayed in step, kept a good four feet away from me by my skirts. "Grandmama and Miss Knight are helping me so much...and my Mama, of course?"

"As far as I am aware, you have had many different experiences since you arrived here in the village...I have witnessed some of them..."

"Of course...and whilst I was a nursling...when we first met...I learned that you wore a kilt until you were sixteen..."

"You are teasing me...which is...acceptable...and I am also aware that maidenhood can be problematic...even for those raised according to the doctrine. My own mother was sent back to her nursery twice, for some months...as I think she told you...there is no shame in it, Miss Scott-Montague?" He grinned, speaking kindly, I thought, not making fun of my false starts. I thought that was kind of him.

"Grandmama says that maidenhood is a state of mind...a girl has to throw off the reassurance of childhood and embrace her responsibility to God and the community...it takes time to learn how to be an adult, I suppose?"

"She also seems to believe that you have reached that state of mind?"

"Grandmama has been very kind to me...I love her so much...and she has shown me how to see God in everything and turn to Him in times of...doubt...or stress?" I told him, remembering to hold my hands together, in front of me. Dating, Meadvale-style, was difficult, there was so much to remember about being modest and ladylike. "I feel my faith now...although I am sure that this all sounds rather...fanciful...to you, Mr Blackstone?"

"Not at all...I was not sure of my own faith until I went off to university...I was raised here of course, so I could hardly avoid church and all that goes with it...but my faith...the things I believed in...I think it took me a while to work that out..." He said, surprising me slightly. He was opening up to me, which was encouraging as it suggested that he was prepared to be honest with me. I had half expected him to be cagier whilst 'walking out' with me, as Grandmama put it, but he was just chatting away, letting me see the real him. Which was the idea of walking out, since a public walk fifty yards in front of Miss Knight was about as close to a date that we were ever going to get in Meadvale. "Lots of our young people just attend church...because they naturally go along with their families...and obviously, in a place like this, they believe in God, because that is the world that they are emersed in...but I don't think your faith can become personal until you are an adult and spread your wings a little...you can only decide what you really believe when you find out who you are?"