I mean everyone knows this, but oh well.
I'm sorry you have to listen to more stupid ranting, but I needed something to do.
Today's Topic: ELIZA HAMILTON DESERVED BETTER (Notice I wrote that in all-caps because IT'S VERY TRUE )
Imagine yourself as Eliza Hamilton. Now, this is what happens to you.
You fall in love with a man at a winter's ball, and you nearly have a heart attack for the duration of 3 minutes. (The entirety of 'Helpless') You get married to him. Shortly after, he goes to war and you find yourself lonely, being a part-time widow. You don't see him for more than 7 months. He comes home. For 3 days. Then he goes back to the war.
Then, the war ends. You now have a son named Phillip. He raps for 22 seconds. Even though your husband comes home, he's busy with the new government and he writes 24/7 LITERALLY. You go on vacation with your sister upstate at your father's house, but he refuses. So, you go upstate without him cause YOU AINT STOPPIN YOUR PLANS FOR HIM-
Soooo, you come back. HE'S STILL WRITING. You live your life normally. For now.
After a while, you see a pamphlet that says that HE CHEATED ON YOU with a woman named Maria Reynolds. You are sad. You burn his letters.
After that, your sister (Peggy) dies. Then, your son dies. You know, Phillip. The rapper. Your husband is the guy who gave him the advice that made him die. Oh, and, by the way, you also realize that your husband likes (And is obsessed with) your sister more than you. Romantically.
You are AMAZING, so you FORGIVE him.
After like two years, he dies in a duel. Then, within the span of 5 months, 11 people close to you (not including your husband) die.
There you go, tragic life. ELIZA HAMILTON DESERVED BETTER!!!
If you don't agree I will fuckin find you.
Im not lying.
YOU ARE READING
Hamilton Trash (Random Hamilton stuff)
RandomLiteral Random Hamilton Trash. This is how I handle my obsession.