The lonely wolf [bxb]

An apology

(Elias)

“What are you thinking about?” Ryker asked as he was running his hand through my hair, which was both soothing and relaxing. We were both taking a bath, which was helping me with the pain after we had sex.

'What it would be like to finally be able to see my parents again, despite what they did to me.” I replied honestly. I could tell he didn't like it when I discussed my parents and my past, but it's something he'd have to deal with whether he likes it or not.

“I can't wait for the day when you'll be able to be free from them. You carry too much burden at such a young age, baby.” I grimaced when he called me baby, not sure if I like it or not.

'I have a lot of help, plus Forest is back, and it seems as if he's stronger now. I hope he won't ever have to leave me again, though.' That's the best part of what happened earlier. Forest coming back all because Ryker and I were having sex, and he wanted to be a part of it.

'Hey I was away for too long, plus my experience with Ryker wasn't pleasant. So I wanted to see what it felt like to be with him knowing he had changed and wouldn't hurt us anymore.' Forest explained, but I could still feel how hesitant he was with this. I was a bit hesitant too. As much as I forgave Ryker for what he did in the past, I had to thread carefully around him.

'Yeah I know, I was just teasing you.' I replied, but Forest surprised me by calling me an asshole before closing the link, as if I had offended him somehow. I only rolled my eyes because knowing him, he'll be back soon since he doesn't have the capability of being away from me for too long. I might have to say that my wolf was a bit obsessed with me.

'Hey , I'm not obsessed with you.' Forest retorted, which had me grinning like an idiot. Ryker might be thinking that I was losing my mind by now.

'And he's back.' I said, which had Forest growling playfully before blocking me. He can be so silly sometimes, but that doesn't stop me from loving him. Back when I had no one, he was more like a father to me than my father. He protected me and made sure I was ok, so how can I not love him?

“You're quiet.” Ryker said, interrupting my thoughts. I only shrugged my shoulders and closed my eyes as he continued to run his hand through my hair. This was what I wanted from my mate, the feeling of love that I never got before. I closed my eyes and felt myself falling asleep as he continued to give me one of the best massages I've ever received in my entire life.

When I woke up, it was still daytime. I didn't see Ryker and I was hungry. Thankfully, he got me dressed, so I just got up and made my way downstairs. I can't believe it, though, I was feeling a lot better than expected. My face flushed as I remembered the things Ryker did to me, how he treated me when we were having sex.

I don't think I can stop myself from wanting more and more of him from now on. I wasn't paying attention when I bumped into someone, looking up I noticed that it was Ryland standing there with a sad expression on his face.

'Are you alright?' I asked and he shrugged his shoulders. He then sighed and shook his head, letting me know that something was wrong.

'Is it kai?' I wasn't trying to be nosy, but if I could help him, I would. I already made a mess of things with him before, so this was me making up for the things I've put him through.

“It's just so hard, you know. I know he's young, but damn the temptation is real. I'm struggling to hold off on mating with him until he's older, but I'm not certain how much longer I can hold off for.” He replied. There was this instinct to help him, I don't know where it came from, but if he wanted someone to talk to I would listen. No one would listen to me once, so I won't do the same now.

'I may not know you that much Ryland but I can tell you're a good person. You wouldn't do anything to hurt anyone, that's not in your nature to do so. You could talk to him, though, figure out how to live together without mating if that's what you truly want. I know you're strong enough to resist, but even with that strength, the bond will always win.' I said carefully, making sure he understood what I was talking about.

“You're truly a Luna, you know that right? Or maybe an Alpha, who knows? But I have to tell you that the role suits you just fine. Thank you, Elias, it meant a lot to me.” He replied. Right as he was about to walk away, I stopped him, there was just one more thing I would like to tell him.

'I also wanted to apologize for everything I've put you through before. It wasn't really my intention to let my soul wander to you. I mean, I knew what I was doing. I knew why I was choosing you, but I didn't know the consequences. All I wanted was love and I thought that if I wasn't getting it with Ryker then you'd be next since you were searching for your mate. I don't know what was going through my head at that time, but I wanted to say I'm sorry.' I did it. I was strong enough to apologize and realize my mistakes without blaming anyone else.

“You have nothing to be sorry for, Elias. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have found my mate. I got a taste of what it would feel like to have a mate because of you, so I went searching for my other half and found kai. We can both move on from what happened in the past, I know I did. All I want is for us to be happy going forward, can you do that for me?" He asked and I nodded my head without hesitation.

I have already made up my mind to let go of the past, to think about the future. But the only way I can do that is to get closure from those who hated me. Ryland gave me a hug before leaving, so I headed towards the kitchen to get something to eat with a smile on my face. It was a good feeling, being happy. I wouldn't trade it for anything else as long as I'm alive.