The Least Favorite Cameron

Chapter 29

"So we're just going to go to a bonfire? Like normal teenagers?" I say in disbelief as we all relax on John B's porch and chat about the bonfire that happens at the beginning of school every year.

"As strange as it seems, I think we are," Kie replies with a chuckle.

"I think that's what we need, a good old OBX night to just get drunk and have fun," JJ says as he takes a hit from his JUUL.

"Meet back here at 8 and we can all go over together?" John B. says and everyone agrees. The rest of the pogues head out for the next few hours leaving John B. and I alone.

It had been a good past few days for the most part. I haven't gone home except once to get more clothes and check on Wheezie. Sarah has been staying at Topper's as well. Wheezie I think feels abandoned by us and I can't blame her but she still isn't completely on our side and wants to trust our dad. I just can't be in that house with him or with Rose. Thankfully Wheezie had texted me that they had gone to the police station to talk with their lawyer so I was able to go home then. I was scared that if he caught me back at home he wouldn't let me leave after the last conversation.

"You wanna watch a movie or something?" John B. asks, pulling me away from my thoughts.

"I'll watch anything but a chick flick," He adds laughing.

"Why don't you put something funny on?" I offer and he gives me a sweet smile and begins looking through the DVDs he has. We settled on the movie The Other Guys with Mark Wahlberg and Will Ferrel. I'm a sucker for Mark and John B. pretends to be jealous whenever we watch him in a movie.

As we lay on the couch, my head in John B's lap, my eyelids become heavy and I begin to doze off. I haven't been able to sleep well at all and I welcome the calm that washes over me as I lay here feeling perfectly content. Everytime I dream, I'm pushed back onto that day on the dock with the explosion of the day on the tarmac or back in Nassau. So many horrible days but without John B. I don't know if I would have quite literally survived it all. When I wake up again I feel slightly delirious and unsure of what time it was. John B. was lightly shaking my shoulder and talking to me in a soothing tone.

"Hey sleepyhead," He says and I turn to see his perfect brown eyes and his curls falling over his tanned skin. The moment is so simple but so precious as we sit and stare into each other's eyes.

"I love you," I whisper to him as I push myself up so I'm closer to him.

"I love you too," He says and pulls me closer to him till our lips meet. We stay like that until suddenly the door is thrown open.

"Hey! No time for that! We have a party to get to!" JJ yells as he covers his eyes with one hand and is holding a case of beer in the other.

"Thanks man. We weren't having a moment or anything," John B. says back sarcastically and laughs.

I get up then and go to change into warmer clothes for the bonfire. The jeans that I throw on are a light wash with several holes in them that are my absolute favorite. I pair them with a black crop top and throw on one of John B's flannels. I love wearing his clothes and he doesn't mind either. I apply a light layer of mascara and before leaving the bathroom I fiddle with the bandana around my neck, just to make sure it looks right. We hadn't talked through anything really. The night I came here we just layed in bed and then fell asleep and have been carrying on as usual. Which don't get me wrong, has been great, but the elephant in the room is weighing on me. He wasn't there at a pivotal moment when I needed him and I can understand why he was unsure of how to feel about the situation. But he shouldn't have been unsure of comforting me. A part of me wonders if he somehow assigns a small amount of blame to me for everything. My family ruined his life and while I didn't have anything to do with it, I was still a Cameron. Or was I Routledge now? We were married but I don't know what we do now.