The most precious medicine

Chapter 9

Wei Wuxian did his best to smile even though he was feeling like his word had just crumbled around him. Of course, he had already known that Lan Zhan would find out what he had done sooner or later, just like Jiang Cheng had. But this was simply way too soon, he was not ready to face him.

He was still numb with pain as the transfer had taken place mere hours ago. Wen Ning had insisted that he took a long rest, but he could not leave his husband to wake up all alone. He needed to make sure that the medicine he had given him had worked. Even if the core had been removed successfully – despite his difficulties, Wen Ning had been just as careful as his sister and Wei Wuxian had done his best to make the job as easy as he could – there was no guarantee that such a weak and small thing could actually save the Chief Cultivator. They could have been too late as well.

That was why Wei Wuxian was currently overcome with relief seeing that not only had Lan Zhan woken up earlier than expected, but he was well enough to be sitting and worrying about him.

And crying. This part, Wei Wuxian had feared the most. He had been almost certain that his husband would not hate him for being given a golden core without his consent, he was after all not Jiang Cheng. He could however not predict how he would react to the knowledge as such. He had been one of the people who had encouraged him the most while he had been striving to form a golden core in Mo Xuanyu's weak body.

And weak the body was, nothing like his own one a lifetime ago. He still felt light headed and if Lan Qiren did not help him to sit on the chair next to Lan Zhan's bed, he would not have been able to get out of his sickbed at all.

It remained a mystery to him why the old Master Lan was suddenly so kind and considerate when it came to him. But he quickly dismissed such thoughts, it must have been just temporary. Lan Qiren was probably just grateful to him for saving his nephew and would go back to his usual grumpy self in no time. There was no way he would stop hating Wei Wuxian now that he had once again defected from the righteous cultivation path.

Wei Wuxian shook his head internally, there was no way he was losing his time thinking about something he could not influence or change. He had his husband crumbling in front of him, he had to put all his attention there. It would not do if Lan Zhan became too emotional and did something which would ruin Wei Wuxian's hard work in saving him. Like starting to grieve again and not give his new golden core enough time to fully heal him and expel the poison.

He gently put his hand onto Lan Zhan's to attract his attention; and no, he was not going to admit even to himself that the said hand was trembling with fear of rejection. Images of Jiang Cheng pushing him away flashed before his eyes and he unconsciously held his breath. Lan Zhan would surely not react like that, would he?

Luckily for him, his husband only seemed to be weeping for him, not pushing him away. On the contrary really. Before he knew it, Lan Zhan's hands carefully encircled him and he was being pulled closer to a firm if a little bony chest. The poison had not been kind to his husband, he still had a long route ahead of him in order to fully recover. Much like Wei Wuxian himself now.

The procedure had been perhaps even worse than he had remembered. Possibly because he already knew what exactly he had been going to lose and how hard life as a normal man, or as a demonic cultivator, could be. Luckily, no one looked at him through their fingers. If anything, they were grateful to him for saving a member of their family and had tried to support him as much as they could. Wei Wuxian had in the end had to chase them away by reminding them that they were breaking the curfew.

For this exact reason, no one saw him almost fainting with relief when Lan Zhan did not reject him. Even if raising his hands tugged painfully at his wound, he still did it to hug his husband back. He could only hope that the other would not notice how his shoulder was getting wet with tears he could not keep in.

"Wei Ying, why..." this time, Lan Zhan managed to say more than just his name. Even the first time, Wei Wuxian had already known what he had wanted to ask, but he had spoiled himself with a few more minutes of pretending he had not understood. Now though, he could not play dumb, not when his husband had asked in such a broken tone.

"Lan Zhan, it is fine," he reassured while gently patting Lan Zhan's back, "I am fine. There is no reason for you to feel bad. I am happy I could help in saving you." He had wanted to crack a joke about how he had just repaid the favour of being protected by his husband during the discussion conference, but he held himself back. It was not the right time to say something like that, not even as a joke.

Lan Zhan did not seem reassured in the slightest and he only held more firmly onto his robes. Wei Wuxian heard him taking a breath, probably to refute his statements with worried words. He did not want to hear anything from his husband. He had done what he had chosen, it was not Lan Zhan's place to mourn the loss of Wei Wuxian's golden core.

He put an effort into lightening his voice and this time, he found it appropriate to crack a joke, a different one though, and tease his distressed husband: "Lan Zhan, it truly is fine. And you know what, I am actually missing you taking care of me and being so good to me. I will let you protect me without a complain this time. So, Hanguang-Jun, my strong Chief Cultivator, would you not take care of this weak and powerless husband of yours?"

This finally seemed to have snapped Lan Zhan from his grieving. He eased the hug a little bit, just enough to be able to look up at Wei Wuxian. "Wei Ying is not weak," he admonished gently. Although there were still pain and sadness etched deep into his voice and his features, if he could tease back, that was all that mattered to Wei Wuxian.

"Welcome back, Lan Zhan," he said with a huge smile as he let his husband wipe tears from his eyes. "I am glad you did not leave me all alone here. What would I have done? I would have not been able to survive your uncle's lectures about me breaking rules if I would not have you at my side."

"Mn, I will not leave Wei Ying," agreed Lan Zhan.

And if this sounded like a more solemn promise than the situation truly required, Wei Wuxian was not going to comment it. He was just glad to have his husband back, no matter what it had cost him. He had long become used to not having a golden core, he was sure he could familiarize himself with the feeling once again.

He could feel how warm Lan Zhan's hands were, thanks to his golden core, that was enough, he did not need anything else.