One Remarkable Mistake [USUK]

Chapter 10

Alfred found himself clinging to any scent that reminded him of the other - glasses of alcohol brought a twang of jealousy as though the various drinks had in some way robbed his memories, drawing away any hint of Arthur with the nauseating scent; putrid smoke and ash gave those slow moments out in the depths of night, and tea brought ease along with clarity.

"She's quite the life of the party", "What a lovely individual", "You must be so happy to be married to such a diamond". A multitude of compliments reigning down upon him, never directed towards him but rather the one who supposedly stood at his side, though that was far from the truth on both of their sides.

Then there came the alcohol, he didn't know how much of this he could take. Already on his fifth glass and it was more than apparent that Francis had gone the cheap route, as always when it came to holding these damn parties. Spade's presence mandatory in order to maintain the peace between both Kingdoms and retain their appearance, and Alfred was far from tipsy to deal with this. Typically this wouldn't have been allowed, there would have been an uproar or backlash, if it wasn't for the fact that he had found a private room far from the entire group, slowly taking down each glass as he waited for the hours to pass by. 

What a fantastic idea it must have seemed, to wed a noble and the one who had been given the mark, it must have appeared as a brilliant idea at first, only for it to backlash completely. His advisor had been suffering severe whiplash due to their rather strained relationship, Alfred growing distant from everyone after the announcement of his husbands death, while that had never been though plausible, he did so much better than anyone had thought would come from him. 

Alfred had taken a life of living in solitude, never seen outside of his royal duties. It was fine, because she was doing more than well at taking over, gladly swimming in the spotlight that nobody ever wanted only to take it in like the sun after many days of frost. It was as though she wasn't troubled by what was lacking.

No, she had settled in rather nicely, and made herself comfortable. Although, every attempt to make a relationship between them only placed more strain on them. He had calmed himself, he could live with her, as long as he remained in the shadows and they maintained their distance, then it wasn't going to be difficult. 

Comfort is often not something provided to one, something in life that is sought for and only given after so many fights. Fight not she did, at the very moment of the wedding night, as he slumped to his knee's and cried until there was no water left in his body, and each breath was a fight to not faint he had moved from the main room. Seeing the bed where they had laid and so many places where they had joked, found solace, along with the beauty of having more than themselves, did not make it easier. Thus, he moved to the King's quarters, for if he was not to share that room with Arthur, then he did not want to see it for the rest of his years. 

Light tapping startled him from hazed thoughts, looking up as he sat his glass down, "Gilbert, what a pleasant surprise." Half of a sigh being let out as he went to stand, only for the other to motion him to remain seated, instead coming over as he pulled out a chair, own glass in hand as the room burst to life with a rather loud snap that ended with Alfred flinching. 

"They really have you still pretending after all this time?" A simple groan and nod being his answer, and there was so much lost to who he was at one point. Gilbert tipping his head to the side, sure that this would not be the person who sat across him if only something had been done differently. 

Eye's now level with him, he captured him in a stare, not the least intimidating with how the lines under his eyes had started to form into more, and those thin wire frames only managed to hide so much. "You know the truth." Hesitating as he took a breath, "He said he loved me, and I know I can trust him, but I just wish I could have been there. He must have been terrified, whatever his last words or thoughts may have been I'll never know. And I don't know if life would have been better if I had stayed at his side, if only he hadn't been alone in those last few minutes." The tissue taken as it was offered, his frames sat aside as he dabbed at his eyes, trying to quell the tears. Only to give up, letting them come down, aware that the company he was in would not judge him, surely not as he couldn't have been the worst of the batch considering there were countless before him. "You know everything that happens in the four Kingdoms, right?"