Shattered Scars

05

Emil's POV:

I feel a bit bad for snapping at my baby boy like I did, for trying to order him around. However, I don't know what I'm supposed to do with that boy. I want to coddle him but I'm not sure that's the best way to go about this situation.

He's not receptive to my coddling, and despite the very hot moment we had earlier, it was strange to be initiating everything. When we had sex for the first time, Matteo was the one begging me and trying to get me to fuck him; I was hesitant because I didn't want to hurt him, but his eagerness eased my nerves.

Now, I'm initiating everything because Matteo thinks he's dirty and ugly. I just want to know how to put him on the path to healing, and I hope this therapist has answers.

I enter the small, private building and check in.

After a small wait, a Beta woman opens another door and smiles kindly at me. She has her long hair pulled back into a long braid and glasses with white frames. Her tanned skin is adorned with freckles and she has on a pair of black slacks and white blouse.

"Emil Schwarz?" she asks, and I stand up. "Is it just you?"

I nod, following her back to a modern office with a small table that has a vase with a few white lilies in it. There is a dark couch and she sits in a wheeled chair while I take a seat on the couch. The room has some kind of scent cleanser, as I cannot smell anything except the lilies and the therapist's mild scent.

"My name is Ida," she says, crossing her knees. "Now, what brings you in today? When you called yesterday, I was under the impression your mate would be here as well."

I sigh. "He's... I hate to say this, but he is kind of my problem right now. I love him, though I haven't said it to him yet, but it is quite hard to manage him right now. He went through a trauma, as I told you on the phone, and he has permanent scars that he believes make him ugly... he does not believe me when I say he is beautiful, and I think that he still believes I am going to reject him."

Ida hums, looking at me intently, urging me to continue.

"I have tried coddling him, reassuring him, and comforting him, but he seems like a shell of the person he was before. It has been over a month, and I know mental healing is not quick, but I just hate watching him suffer. I want to be more firm, but I worry for his reaction."

Ida nods, leaning back in her seat. "What was your relationship like before the attack? Did you often guide and take control or was it more of an equal split?"

"I took control. Matteo's family was very traditional and he was always kept thinking that he needed to be more submissive. I wouldn't mind if he wasn't, but he seemed to enjoy leaning on and relying on me."

"Was it in every aspect that you took control? Every day life, sex, whatever it was?"

"Yes," I respond, before diving deeper into how I very much had control and Matteo relied on my guidance and strength.

Ida waits for me to describe our relationship before the attack. She speaks up every now and then, to get more details on Matteo's family, my family, and our relationship.

"Well, I believe you have been going about this the way in which you have thought would benefit your mate," Ida points out. "But, I am not sure it has been the path that Matteo is going to respond to. From what you have said, he has responded to your controlling personality, and he has seemed to enjoy you telling him what to do. I am going to recommend that you try to take back control... you know him best, so order him to do things, try to shake him up, don't just let him lay down and sulk. It will only allow him to overthink and work himself up."