For A Woman

Everything Moves

A few days later

"Miss Watson, I believe this is for you" a letter was held in between Charles' fingers, she was alive...right? This meant she was alive! My hands slowly took the letter from his clutches thanking him - I was getting my hopes up, it might not have even been her, it could've been some kind of threat from an unknown source

For a few moments, I paced quietly behind my tent debating whether to open it - nothing good came from waiting but what if it was something bad? What if the very paper I held contained news of her demise? What if it was that she had ran out of time and had to leave right now? There were so many options of what I could be holding in that very moment...each and every one scared me more than the last

After taking a deep breath and checking no one else was around, I removed the envelope and pulled out the letter and slowly began to read, the more I saw, the more it hurt...the letter contained my own demise. I had to take a moment to gather myself, this couldn't be true - there had to be some misunderstanding or false information, a ploy maybe? It had to be!

'To my sweetest Ethel Bowtown

It was wonderful to receive all your letters, I apologise for not replying sooner, I was preoccupied. You see, I met this lovely gentleman in Annesburg - not the one you told me about but a good man who gave me directions...there's no easy way to say this but I believe I'm finally pregnant. I know we agreed and discussed that this would be your role in the relationship, providing a child for us - I want to thank you for saving my life before, when you sent me away on that horse...you saved both of us

Yours sincerely

Kamyla Edwards'

I read those words over and over, I should've been happy for her, for us! But knowing the reason I was in this predicament, that she'd lied straight through her teeth seemed to hurt so much more than any pleasant sentiment...it also meant she'd cheated while I was working to afford us a future - it wasn't me she loved, just the idea of what I could give her

I was doing this because she couldn't. And now she had the fucking nerve to complain, and moan, and cry, about something she asked for?! She told me that she was shot when she was 17 and it caused her to not be able to carry a child- so I agreed to do it, for us! One thing she knew was that I never wanted to be the one pregnant but here we were, and now she was ditching?!

"...She tricked me" my emotions were changing every other second, I was distraught with grief, pissed off, happy for her achievement, disappointed that I fell for her stories - that I loved her so much and didn't see this coming. She was always talking about going on trips alone for exploration, I didn't know it would be 'that' kind of exploration but at least she tried to be with me

"Who did?" I shoved the letter up my skirt, hoping Micah hadn't seen as I saw him turn the corner - I wiped my tears quickly and stood as if nothing had happened - I couldn't appear weak in front of him, he'd just tease and taunt then be mad about how I was with Kamyla - it would be a whole mess I didn't need on top of everything else, especially from him

"Oh, no one you'd know" I went to walk away but as normal, he followed not missing a step - i didn't even know who the father was, I was drunk, it was pitch black and steamy, I thought I'd never see him again. It was just a quick way to get a child, most men these days didn't even want the baby so he'd never know if I didn't stay in contact...it was gonna be ours

"Oh c'mon, someone finally pulled the wool over the great Edith Watson's eyes, let me relish in the moment" I made the mistake of spinning round causing the letter to fly out and land at his feet, before I knew it - it was in his hands almost open. I took the opportunity to grab my horse and speed out of camp, he was the one person I didn't want to know

By the time he'd finished reading, I was long gone...