Where The Hell Am I? (Alastor/Radio Demon x Human Female Reader) (DISCONTINUED)

Chapter One

When my eyes opened, I yawned. I looked to my right to turn off my alarm . . .

But my alarm wasn't there. In its place was an arm. The area around it was stained red. That's when I realized that I wasn't on my bed. I was on the ground in a mainly red place.

I screamed and scurried away from the arm, slamming my eyes shut.

"Where the hell am I?!" I screamed.

"You're in hell!" a voice laughed. The voice sounded oddly familiar.

I opened my eyes and looked up. Standing there, smiling at me . . .

Was Angel Dust.

That couldn't be.

"Are you . . . Angel Dust?"

"Yes, I am!"

"I love you!"

"Calm down. I charge extra for females."

"Not like that!" I laughed. Angel smiled.

"Welcome to hell!"

"I . . . can't be in hell," I said quietly.

"Best to come to terms with it now. You're in the middle of our turf war."

"I can't be in hell!" I yelled, standing up. "I'm not dead!"

"You are in hell."

"Is this roleplay or something?"

"Roleplay? Why would this be roleplay? You're in hell!"

"No, I'm not!"

"Yes, you are!"

"I'm not dead!"

"Yes, you are!"

"You're a television character! You don't fucking exist!" I screamed.

Angel Dust looked at me in confusion. "The fuck?"

"This isn't real . . . this isn't real . . . this isn't real," I muttered to myself over and over again.

Suddenly an egg flew past my head, yolk hitting my hair.

"You know, it's weird. You're the only demon or devil down here that looks like a human."

"Hmm?"

Angel Dust pulled a mirror out of his pocket, showing it to me. I looked just like I normally did.

"That's how I know this isn't real!" I said. "I caught you!"

Angel Dust snatched his mirror back. "It's real alright. Don't believe me? Look at that fight between Cherri Bomb and that dumbass. That look fake to you?"

Sure enough, as I watched, they went through the same motions as the did in the show. However, instead of Sir Pentious hitting Angel Dust with his chains, he hit me. I screamed.

"Oops, I missed," Sir Pentious frowned.

Cherri Bomb kicked him as she did in Hazbin Hotel. I managed to get out of the chains.

"What about the Hazbi- I mean, Happy Hotel?!" I screamed at Angel Dust, starting to believe that this could be real. "Vagatha's going to fucking kill you!"

"How do you know about all this shit if you've only been down here for ten minutes?!"

"I know more than you'd think!"

"Like what?!"

"I know that you work for Valentino, that Charlie and Vaggie are dating, that you died in 1947 from a drug overdose, and I know for a fucking fact that you are going to be fucking lectured when Vaggie finds out what you've done!"