Where The Hell Am I? (Alastor/Radio Demon x Human Female Reader) (DISCONTINUED)

Chapter Two

I knocked on the doors of I.M.P's office. When nobody answered, I walked in. I saw Blitzø and Loona and Moxxie and Millie.

"Do you want someone from the living world dead because they fucked you up and you want to get them back?" Blitzø asked, not looking away from his desk.

"Not today, Blitzø," I said.

He looked up. "Wait a minute . . . you're not a demon."

"No, I'm not," I said, causing Millie, Moxxie, and Loona to look at me.

"What?" Moxxie asked.

"How are you down here?" Millie asked.

"I don't know. That's why I need to know who is capable of taking me from the other side and bringing me here," I said.

"Why'd you come to us?" Loona asked.

"Because you guys are characters in my favorite show!" I smiled.

Everyone looked confused. After explaining all I knew, they looked even more confused.

"I'm not real?!" Moxxie cried as Millie comforted him.

"How do I know this isn't all one big lie?" Blitzø asked.

"You're name is Blitzø, the O is silent, and you're an imp. You fuck Stolas to get a magic book that will let you go to the human world to carry out your kills. Your adopted daughter's name is Loona and you stalk your employees. I don't know how far you are in the series right now, so I can't tell you much else, for fear that I will spoil something," I said.

"Oh my Satan!" Blitzø yelled.

"I need to talk to Stolas. He might know something about this," I said.

"Can't help you with that. I don't talk to that privileged asshole unless I have to," Blitzø said.

I grabbed Blitzø and pushed him against the wall. "You have to!"

"Fine!" Blitzø said. "Give me a minute!"

❌❌❌

I don't know how he did it, but Blitzø got me into Stolas' palace. It was so cool.

Stolas saw us. "Why did you bring this girl? You said that you wanted to talk to me about a date."

"Hi, I'm Y/N!" I said. "Big fan of you, Stolas!"

"Good to know," Stolas said, looking confused. "Why are you here and why do you look like that?"

"Because she's not from this world," Blitzø said. "She's from something that she refers to as 'the other side'."

"That's actually what Alastor the radio demon refers to it as," I said.

"The radio demon?!" Stolas gasped. "You've talked to him?!"

"Who's that?" Blitzø asked.

"Doesn't matter," I said. "The point is that I'm not from this world, which is why I look like a human, even though I'm here in hell. Even your magic grimore can't bring me to my home. My home doesn't exist in this universe."

Stolas looked at me in disbelief. "How do I know that you're being honest?"

"That's what everyone else asked too, including your precious little Blitzy," I said.

"How did you know my nickname for him?" Stolas asked.

"Because I watch you every single day on a device called a phone! You aren't real in my world! You're cartoons!" I yelled. I explained everything once again, my head starting to hurt. Then, I went through a recap of waking up, meeting Angel Dust, going to the hotel, talking to Alastor, going to I.M.P, and finally explaining how I got here.

"I . . . I don't know how to help you," Stolas said.

"Well, thank you for listening, I guess," I sighed.

I left, not knowing what to do. I wanted to go home. It had been kind of cool at first . . . but now, I wasn't sure. I was walking with my head down when I ran into somebody. I looked up.

"It's you, again!" Charlie smiled. "Have you figured out how to get back to your world?"

"Not yet," I sighed. "I don't know what to do. How's it going with you?"

"Me and Vaggie are going to Ozzie's!" Charlie smiled. "We've never been before, but we've heard good things!"

"Asmodeus," I whispered, pieces clicking together in my head. "He's been around for such a long time! Maybe he knows how to help me!"

"Maybe," Charlie said. "But he only allows couples and I doubt that many demons would like to go on a date with a human, no matter how pretty she may be."

I frowned. "True. Wait, did you call me-"

"Besides, unless you're super important, you can't get in without a reservation and they can take months," Vaggie said.

"Or you have to be one of the most feared demons in hell. Then they'll let you in just about anywhere so you don't get mad and destroy them all," Charlie added.

"Well, have fun on your date," I said.

Charlie and Vaggie walked away.

I sat on the ground and laid my back against a building, closing my eyes. If I had to be stuck here forever, I decided that I should probably get comfortable.

"I heard about your little predicament. What a shame," a voice that sounded like radio static said.

"What do you want?" I asked, opening my eyes to look at Alastor.

"To help!" he said.

"Then tell me how you know that I'm from 'the other side'."

"You wanted to talk to Asmodeus and I will help," Alastor said, ignoring my suggestion.

"How?"

"I will be your date!"

I thought about that. "It could work. Most people are scared of you, so you could get in. I would be going with you, so I could get in," I mumbled, mainly to myself. "And I would get to go on a date with my favorite fictional character."

"It's a deal, then," Alastor held out his hand for me to shake.

I pushed his hand away. "I'm not a fan of your deals. How about we call it . . . a favor? I will repay your favor before leaving as long as it is not too . . . Well, you know, insane."

"Agreed!" Alastor smiled.

"Then, let's go!"