Repurposed

Captured

*Warning: Depressive thoughts, thoughts of suicide, painful and probably fatal wounds.*

I sighed heavily as Error opened a portal. We ran out of medical supplies much more quickly than I had thought, and I was dreading the supply run. My back was still sore from that arrow, and I could still feel the light magic searing through my very soul. If I was being honest, I wanted to talk to Dream. Sure, he might attack me, but I'd be willing to take whatever punishment to at least learn how Dream survived. I didn't know what Jeffery and his goons could have done to him to prevent me from sensing him, but it had fooled me. It cost me Dream's trust, and I had to find a way to fix it.

I caught several concerned looks from the gang, but ignored them. They knew Dream was my brother, and perhaps they were suspicious of my story. No matter. They could believe what they wanted. My conscience was clear. I had nothing to prove to them.

We emerged in a hot AU. There was no snow, despite this being the Snowy Woods. We split up into twos again, and this time, Dust came with me. He shuffled along behind me, kicking halfheartedly at the grass.

"Hey, Nightmare?"

I turned and gave him a surprised look. "You never use my name. What's up, Dust?"

He hesitated, then looked up. "The ceiling, heh."

"I'm serious. Is there something wrong?"

He rubbed the back of his neck, considering his words. "I... just wanted to tell you...." He broke off, looking out over the river. Steam rolled off the surface, indicating how hot it was. I wondered if it was hot enough to burn someone, but Dust's next words banished everything else from my mind. "Do you... have a crush on anybody?"

I blinked, feeling my cheeks heat up. This was... odd. In an effort to change the subject, I chuckled. "I-isn't that a question you could ask in a game of Truth or Dare?"

Dust met my eyelight, and I sensed he was deadly serious. "Do you?"

I pursed my lips and looked away. "No. Do you?"

He nodded, and I could sense him battling with himself. Fear was trying to drown out his confidence, and I looked back at him.

"Nightmare, I..." he began, stuttering through his thoughts. "I-I um, the thing is, I- we've been friends for a long time, a-and I don't wanna do anything to ruin our friendship, but I wanted to say," he took a deep breath, letting it out and looking me in the eye. "I l-like you. A lot."

He stood stock still, beads of sweat rolling down his face. The true meaning of his confession suddenly dawned on me, and I smiled. 

"Dust, I appreciate your honesty," my smile faded, and I looked down. "but I can't say I return the feelings. I'm sorry."

I winced when I felt Dust's disappointment. The sadness was intense, like how I felt to know Dream hated me. I looked up at him, trying to think of way to mend the situation.

"Dust, I... I don't want to hurt you. I really don't. I just couldn't live with myself if I led you to believe I was being truthful-"

"I get it," Dust held a hand up, silencing me. "It's ok, boss. I just needed to know if I even had a chance...."

I walked up to him and put my hand on his shoulder. "You're my best friend, Dust. I could never lie to you, or the rest of the gang if I could help it. Which is why, I think you deserve to know...." He looked up at me expectantly, and I drew a breath. "You aren't my oldest friend. I'm actually still looking for a friend of mine. I don't even know if they are still alive, but their name is Lust. I haven't seen them, I'm not even sure if they exist, but I do know I need to find them."