Offbeat || Harry Styles

Chapter 13

Happiness does not last forever, I thought as I left Harry's house. It was dark outside, the cold air nipping at my skin as I walked down the street to my house. 

Of course, in another world, Harry would be walking or driving me back home, but this was reality, and it was cruel. I wrapped my arms around myself as I continued my path. In a few minutes, I was walking up the stairs to my room, silently, so that my mums wouldn't wake up and ask where I've been. Surely they would juice the answers from me tomorrow, which was Friday, meaning I had to help Linda at her bakery. 

I mentally groan, wanting nothing but to spend the day in bed, or at the library with Harry. I  quickly peel my clothes off and change into an oversized shirt and some shorts I found at the back of my drawer. My hair is pulled out of its bun, leaving it to rest just below my breasts. I take the ends between my fingers, mentally noting that I needed a haircut soon. I crawl into bed, taking my phone with me. I skip when I see that I have a text message from Harry.

Are you home safe? H. 

Yes. Thank you for asking. X 

Goodnight, timmy. Xxxx

You spoil me with your X's. Good night, Harry. Xxxxx

My smile grows as I press send. I place my phone on the nightstand and switch the lights off. My arms wrap around my second pillow,hugging it to my chest. A few minutes later, I feel myself drift to sleep.

."What is this?!" Ashley screams at me, holding up her new IPhone. I furrow my eyebrows, surprised that she actually screamed at me. 

"What do you mean, mum?" I confusedly ask. Linda appears behind Ashley, her cheeks wet with tears, but her eyes blazing as she glared at me as if I was not her child. My heart beats faster at the sight, not used to being under Linda's harsh glare. She was always a nice person. Too nice to even glare at anyone. 

"You're with a boy? Really? Is this how I raised you? To go out with boys behind my back?!" The vein in her neck strains as she  yelled at me, placing her phone in front of my face. My jaw drops as I look at the phone, gasping when I see a picture of Harry and I. How did she get this? 

"M-mum, I can explain-" I start but she shut me up with another growl.

"Don't call me mum. I don't have a fucking daughter!" Her words feel like a knife digging it's way into me as she leaves the living room, breaking a few objects as she climbs the stairs. I imagine the photos of me hung up there on the floor, shattered and ripped.My heart feels like its about to burst as I turn to Linda for comfort. Her arms were wrapped around herself as she weeped, eyebrows pulled down in a frown. 

"Mum," my voice breaks as I walk closer to her. I flinch when she takes a step back, shaking her head at me. 

"Don't you dare," she warned, her glare practically glueing my feet to the ground. "I did not raise you to become whatever you are. Straight," she scoffed, disgust laced in her tone. "You and him can rot in hell, where you belong." 

Everything seems to be crashing down as my mother turns her back to me, leaving me standing alone.

A loud gasp escapes my throat as the tears finally come.I jolt awake, my cheeks stained with tears, my breathing uneven and my body undeniably sweaty. It takes me a minute to register what is going on, that that was just a dream. My mothers did not let go of me. A loud, deep sigh escapes my lips as I lie back down.  I rub my eyes with the back of my hands, sighing loudly. It felt so real, which made me terrified of what is yet to come when I finally do tell them about my sexuality. I glance at the digital clock on my nightstand. 2:37AM.

I try to fall back to sleep, but I find none. About an hour passes, and I'm still rolling in bed, trying to get some sleep I know I will need tomorrow. Well, today. With a huff, I decide that I will not get sleep tonight and leave my room. With my phone tightly gripped in my hand, I walk to the balcony. The stars were scattered across the space, standing out in the dark. The cold air pinches my flesh but I didnt mind. I roll my phone between my fingers, my teethI digging into my bottom lip. I unlock the phone, my fingers working against the screen and I type in Harry's number. I know it is irrational of me to call him at this time, but I cannot help but have the urge to rant about my dream. I nervously tap my foot against the wooden floor, my teeth nipping at my lips. I raise the phone to my ear, impatiently waiting for him to answer. Four rings later, I hear his voice ringing through my ears. 

"Timmy?" his deep, rough voice is ends a wave of electricity through my body, awakening it more than it already is. "Are you okay?"

 "Hi," I breathe into the speaker. "Yeah, I'm fine." I hear him shift around, the sound of his bed squeaking and his deep breaths. He clears his throat before speaking again.

"What's up?" 

"Sorry I woke you up," I start. "I just felt like I need to talk to you right now." 

"It's okay," I could practically feel his smile through the phone. "Why aren't you asleep? It's three in the morning." 

"Bad dream," I say.

"Tell me about it." 

"Okay." 

When I finish telling him all about it, all I got in response is his breathing. A few moments later, I hear him muttering incoherent words that I did not catch.

"It's not as bad as it sounds." he finally says.

"It seems like it." I reply, feeling oddly tired after ranting about it. I walk back to my room,locking the balcony's door behind me.

"Well, it's not, alright?" he insists. I can hear the desperation behind his tone, but appreciate that he is trying to make me feel better at the moment. 

"Alright," I say as I crawl back into bed, hiding under the covers. I sigh, mentally shaking off the unwanted thoughts out of my head.

 "Are you going to the library tomorrow?" he asks. 

"No, I have to help my mum at her bakery. I usually help every Friday, if I don't have anything planned beforehand." 

"Oh,I thought we were going to meet up," he lightly laughed. "it's okay. Does your mum bake her pastries?" 

I smile, nodding even though he can't see me. "Yeah, they're some pastries,"  I chuckle. "Best in town."

 "It seems like I'll be paying her a visit soon, you know, just to sure to test them out," 

"You're welcome any time," I assure him. "Just pretend we don't know each other." I add.

"She minds?" 

"She doesn't particularly like the thought of me around men. Just act as if you're a normal customer." 

"Alright," he sighs. "Wow, it's like five the morning." 

"Seriously?" I gasp and turn to the clock. It read 5:03AM. Shit. 

"Shit," he laughed.

 "I'm going to be so sleepy," I whine. "I wish I could sleep all day." 

"Don't we all," Harry sighed. "Alright, hate to break it to you, but I can barely keep my eyes open anymore." he laughed. 

"I was going to suggest we go to sleep," I chuckle. "Sorry again for disturbing you,"

 "You never disturb me. Only when you tap your fingers platforms he table. It annoys the shit out of me." I laugh, my hand slapping against my mouth when I realize that it was a bit too loud. 

"Sorry," I grin."Apology accepted, Timmy. Now, you go get your beauty sleep." I smile a little too wide as I feel my cheeks flush. "Good night, Harry."

 "Good night, Timmy."