Our Aquarium

29 ~ Eliana

Everything hurts. I don't know what to do now.

I'll just make things go back to normal. Things were good before Wesley and things will be good after. I have Jacob and my friends and...

Who am I kidding things won't ever go back to normal. My friends don't like my boyfriend and I started to fall for another guy. But I can try to make things go back to normal. Right?

Pulling my knees to my chest I let my tears fall again. Why did Wesley have to do this? Why did he have to say those things? Why?

There goes my Thanksgiving, I was kind of getting used to spending it with someone. I haven't been alone for the holidays since I met Emma, Trish and Layla. Now I feel like I'm back in high school with an abusive aunt who either neglected me or used me. But I can make do.

Picking up my remote I flip through the channels and eventually settle on Hunger Games. Less than an hour later I fall asleep.

I dream about Wesley and the potential happiness we could've had. We would have Rex and apparently a daughter named Sailor and all her very crazy uncles and aunts. Then her grandparents. She would be spoiled with love. We would have three more to follow...

Stretching my legs, I stand up and climb in the pool with Sailor and Wesley. She sits in her floaty, laughing as she splashes up the water. Her blue eyes glow and I laugh as she attempts to shake her wet curly brown hair when it sticks to her face.

"Hi, Sailor," I sing. She holds her arms out for me and I smile as I pick her up and give her kisses that she reciprocates.

She begins to babble about the water and I only encourage her. She's so adorable. Wesley swims up and wraps his hands around my growing bump and places a kiss to my lips then to Sailor's.

"Hi daddy's girl."

I can only roll my eyes. Sailor is a Daddy's girl until Daddy starts to do her hair or changes her diaper or feed her. Then she's a Mama's girl. Daddy is best for playtime.

"Eliana we need another player."

"I'm not getting on your shoulders, I'm pregnant." I grumble. "And who's gonna watch Sailor."

Grandma immediately comes running or swimming. "I'll take my sweet girl!" She takes Sailor out of my arms and kisses her cheeks.

Wesley only smiles as he goes underwater, and positions me over his shoulders. We play two rounds with Zeke and Mackenna. They won both and my competitive husband had some words.

Later I pulled him over to the lounge chairs and sat in between his legs as we watched our family including Jackson and Sierra. Laughing I rest my head on Wesley's shoulder as Ethan plays with Sailor. She loves him and he's really good with her.

"I can't wait for you to get here," Wesley sighs rubbing his hands over my firm stomach.

Giggling I turn into him and press a kiss to his jaw before he gives me one on my lips.

I love this man.
~
I'm awoken from my sleep by a knock to the door. Then I hear the loud bark of a familiar German Shepard. Thanks for the warning Rex.

With the chain lock still on, I open the door. Wesley tries to push in but when he finally realizes the chain he lets out a sigh.

"Eliana I'm sorry."

I don't say anything. I think I said everything in front of his family.

"I brought you a plate. Potato salad, Turkey, barbecue, pasta, corn, stuffing, green beans, baked potatoes, Mac n cheese, garlic knots and pecan pie." He chuckles nervously. "Ok I might have brought multiple plates. If it's too much I could definitely help you eat it."

I close the door and undo the lock before opening the door enough for me to reach out and grab the food. I don't miss his sigh as he places the bag handle in my hands. When the door is open enough Rex slips through and I let him then close the door on Wesley.

Sliding to the floor, I lean against the door and being to open up the food as Rex comforts me, resting his head on my thighs. "You're such a good boy," I compliment. "I wish your owner was smarter."

"Eliana I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say. I hurt you and you're right I didn't think before I said what I said, I was just trying to piss off my dad."

The food is still warm so I begin to dig in. I'm so hungry.

Wesley keeps talking and I halfway listen.

"It was wrong Eliana, but everything else was fucking right. Being with you is indescribable. I didn't lie when I said you ruined me. I don't know how I'll be able to be with any other girl after being with you."

Oh my gosh, Eleanor can cook. I dig into the potato salad.

"You don't have to talk to me, I'll give you time, just please don't let this be the end, Eliana. It can't be the end when we've just started the beginning. I need you. Y-you've made me feel things that I've never felt in my life. You make me ridiculously happy. I'm unaware of how I did it before you."

He sits and reminisces about the times we had while occasionally laughing to himself. I eat my food and keep Rex hostage while pretending he isn't affecting me severely. Once I've finish eating and it seems as if Wesley is done talking, I open the door to let Rex back out. Wesley attempts to push in but lets me win. Same as always. But I don't feel like a winner.

I clean up and go to bed. I know that I won't feel any better in the morning but maybe I'll be able to dull my emotional pain with sleep.

Then again you can't dull pain with sleep if you can't go to sleep. 

I decide to FaceTime Emma. It's only 10 so there's no way she's sleep. She answers on the third ring and the immediate look of concern on her face tells me that I don't look as together as I thought. No words are said before she begins to add Trish and Layla to the call. They all instantly know as well.

Emma is the first to speak. "What happened with Wes?"

I tell them everything he said today recounting every detail that has played over and over in my mind since I left the Cross' house. Then I confess what really happened two years ago. How all we did was eat and read...no sex.

Layla is the first to speak.

"We love you. We will always be here for you no matter what."

Trish agrees. "Tomorrow we will be over with strawberry ice cream and Oreos and that tea that you love to get from Dutchbros."

A smile comes to my face. I love them so much, but I do have work tomorrow. They tell me to take off, but I am not going to let Wesley ruin my favorite thing in the world. We agree to have ice cream and Oreos that evening along with Thai food. I agreed with that.

After talking for a little while longer with my friends I feel better and we decide to call it a night. With an eased mind I'm finally able to get some sleep without thinking or dreaming about Wesley.