Alfaaz

18.amaya

Jis qadar jiski qadar ki
Uss qadar hum be-qadar hue.....

Importance.

You know what rank important holds in life? Let me give you an example.

Before any exam we try to pick important questions and focus on them more then others. And when they are asked in paper we feel like we had aced the exam and will pass with the best marks.

But what if you are not important but still someone gives you the importance? Like you are the queen of person's life.

Time, trust,test  have importance in ones life. Never waste your time, trust and test yourself with something stupid. Know your worth never give someone a power to break and crush you  under thier shoes. Hold thier leg and make them fall first on butt.

Always trust you parents for they know what you are for they have seen you growing they have seen your struggle and your pain too. You are thier flesh.

And if they know your worth that doesn't mean that you should break thier heart. Never! They struggle with you in your journey. When you were growing in the womb your mother had cried in pain while your father held your mother in his arms trying to save his love. Three of you will be in every journey even if they up there in sky know that they are helping you.

رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا
Rabbi irhamhuma kama rabbayani sagheera

My Lord, have mercy upon them (parents) as they brought me up [when i was] small.

Surah Al-Isra - 17:24

Days passed like years for me who was trying to cope up with her life without nabhan.

How important nabhan was just in a month he had this effect that killed me but I will not fall now.

I will stand and will focus on  life. I had joined the family business helping my family and joined gym too for I needed to take out my anger on someone but can not beat someone so gym is best for anger.

Still at night when I am  alone and cry missing him who didn't even glanced me back.

Once my mother saw me crying and now whenever she feels she comes and sleep with her daughter or talk till she is asleep.

Every mother has a heart of petal soft sweet and so pure for her child. And when the child is one and only than it's like a cub with tigress. No one can mess with a single child mother even her own husband.

Today I wanted to sing nothing special but than remembered nabhan saying that he would love to hear her sing him a song which she wanted  to reserve only to sing for him.I  sighed when a song stricked my mind which I wanted to sing for nabhan for now.  slowly playing the guitar and sing in low voice not to disturb anyone

🎶Wo mere aane pe khil jana tera
Wo mere jaane pe chid jana tera
Wo mere chhune pe chhil jaana tera

I remember him lightening when I enter the room and give me a smile. A smile crept on my lips

Yaad hai na..

Wo paas mere pe pighal jaana tera
Boond boond mujhpe baras jaana tera
Til til mujhko tarsana tera
Yaad hai na
Yaad hai na
Yaad hai na

Him being all jealous and possesive when abbas came and we went for shopping.

Honthon se palkon ko kholna
Palkon pe dardon ko talna
Dardon ko chadar mein chhodna

A shudder run to my body remembering the first kiss how he laughed which made my heart beat accelerate.

Jo tere takiye pe nnendein thi padi
Jo teri neendon mein raatein thi dhali
Jo teri raaton mein saanse thi chali

Yaad hai naa
Yaad hai naa
Yaad hai naa

Aaja na phir se chand tale
Main aur tu ek saath jale
Main aur tu ek saath bujhe

I remember us talking while staring the moon and him being all gentle and kissed me on forehead.

Wo mere aane pe khil jana tera
Wo mere jaane pe chid jana tera
Wo mere chune pe chhil jana tera

Yaad hai na..

Wo.. paas aane pe pighal jana tera
Boond boond mujhpe baras jana tera
Til til mujhko tarsana tera

Yaad hai na
Yaad hai na
Yaad hai na.🎶

Sighing I stared the moon which was again full today. The moon brings the memories of our talks and even our moments which I will cherish for the rest of the life time.

How can life take such turns changing a person in a new one. Like totally new.

Chacha jaan still under one roof with us but I ignore him like a pleague. Sadaf was normal and so does her brother nothing changed everything was as it was but only addition of tayijaan and tayajaan with thier sons were making it hard for me to stay sane and not yell at farid who was reserved but can sometimes act like a detective asking so many questions which will irk you. Faaris still goes there and comes back but we never talked about them.

I avoided sitting with the cousins as they can really harmful asking which might end them death and me in jail.

I really wanted to be alone and now the pressure was enough. Working in a well known company is not easy that too when you are working as the co CEO I know that I am still not experienced but baba was helping saying that he will guid me with all work and everyone in there were cooperative even tayajaan who would help me to understand the presentation explained by the employees.

I was medical student and didn't know anything about business so  needed time to understand all these.

Faaris use to come and say me about his experience as he too a medical student but picked the business as he wanted to be the head of all people.

He told me about all the funny incidents and even warned me about the does and don'ts of business.

But still my cycle come and ends with nabhan.

Even when tayijaan takes his name I hiss in pain and go from there not wanting to cry in front of them.

I just pray that nabhan stays happy and achieve power and happiness in his life.

To be continue......