Hogwart's Biggest Prank War

X : Voldie's New Recruit

Voldemort moodily spun around in his spinny chair, unsure of what to do. Sure, he could go out a murder masses of muggles, but he had minions for that.

He sighed, wondering where all the fun had gone. Before Harry Potter, it was just about killing helpless people, having people beg at his mercy, and in doing that, also ridding the world of Mudbloods.

But then Harry Potter had been born, and suddenly Voldemort had tons of pressure placed upon his shoulders, forcing him to kill the boy – but he hadn't yet.

Voldemort frowned. It was the one thing he wanted to do on his own – kill Harry Potter. But he couldn't do even that. Sure, he had a lot of great servants – but it had been years since he had had a friend.

Voldemort stood up and made his way over to his bed, and laid his head upon his fluffy pink pillow, and just before he fell into a deep, evil slumber, he decided to go to the local newspaper the next day.

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Greensdale Park seemed like a fairly ordinary muggle suburb just north of London – but it wasn't. Greensdale was a small town which was mainly populated with muggles, but had little wizards within it – except Greensdale Park. It was crawling with magical folk – dangerous magical folk.

They knew that killing the muggles in Greensdale would be far too suspicious, so they settled to just torturing them for release, using curses and occasionally rape to terrify the ordinary families, before casting a memory charm on them when they had released their anger. So for the most part, the muggles there were completely oblivious.

The Death Eater's in Greensdale Park owned muggle homes in suburban areas, which they loathed, but they mainly spent all of their time in Lord Voldemort's hidden mansion, invisible to all but those who possessed the Dark Mark, who could bring along others if needed.

Voldemort had named his mansion the 'Retreat' so that when the Death Eaters referred to it, it wouldn't be suspicious.

Greensdale residents hadn't the faintest clue about magic, and there were even dark wizards on their council. Consequently, they were able to access the Greensdale newspaper by tapping the middle page thrice, and repeating 'Master' thrice in three different sentences.

Voldemort wouldn't be so stupid to use seven.

So in the morning, Voldemort used a glamour and dressed in his best robes, murdered a little girl who said he was wearing a dress, alerted his Death Eaters for a mass memory charm, and arrived at the Greensdale newspaper building.

It was old, made mainly out of wood, and had three stories, only two visible to muggles. The third floor was the wizards department.

Voldemort chuckled. All of the data and records, and the ministry had never glanced at the small town twice.

"Excuse me, sir"

Voldemort turned. A petite girl was sitting at a desk, looking over some papers. "May I help you? You can't go back there without authorisation" she said, nodding towards the corridor leading into offices, and the elevator at the end.

Voldemort gave her a twisting smile that made her gulp.

"I assure you, I am plenty authorised. My name is Carter McWright. I am certain you will find me under your files"

The girl scanned the list of authorised workers.

"Do you have any ID?" she asked, finally.

Voldemort nodded, and pulled out a council ID. "I hope this shall suffice"