Softie

Chapter 29

Jayda's POV
Sunday, September 27, 2022

My birthday is in a few days and to be honest, I don't want to celebrate. Billie told me we could start small by having a little get together. Just with her family, our friends, and of course my family. 

I was hesitant about the whole thing, and I was only doing this for billie. As I said I don't celebrate my birthday. Plus, when I tried to celebrate my birthday something always happened. I left that part out from billie.

Looking back I probably should've told her.

__

"Baby." Billie said as she hopped on my bed. "What?" I questioned. I did have a bit of an attitude, but I'm always like this when it gets close to my birthday. "Jeez what crawled up your ass and died." She mumbled.

"Nothing." I mumbled as I scrolled through instagram. "Ok then." She said softly before looking at the time. "So I got some of the party stuff for your birthday, which is on the 4 of october." She reminded. 

"I'm aware billie." I said dryly. "What's wrong dude." She said as she sighed. "Nothing." I said as I continued to scroll. She sighed before getting up and heading out my room. Before she left, she said something.

"I'm just trying to help, and if you really don't want to celebrate you should've just told me." She said before slamming my door. I threw my phone on the bed before sighing. I heard a knock on my room door.

"Come in." I said knowing it's my mom. "Hey." She said. "Hi." I mumbled. "You know being mean to everybody won't get you anywhere." She said. "I know I'm sorry I just- I can't do this mom, I can't just act like dad is here." I said.

"You should've told billie that." She said. "I know." I said sadly before looking down. "I have work, so I'm going to head out, but make sure to apologize to her." She said before leaving my room.

I sighed and grabbed my phone going to billies contact, and hovering over the factime button. Will she answer? I pressed the button and it rang and rang before she declined the call. I groaned and decided to text her.

mi amour<3

Baby please answer, I want to apologize.

I didn't mean to be so rude, the truth is I
just can't celebrate, I can't act like my dad
is alive. I appreciate you trying to help, but
I physically can't. I'm so sorry I was mean to
you that's never my intention. I get if you're
 mad at me, and you have every right to b

but I love you, and I hope you can forgive me. </3
read at 11:45am

I waited for her to reply, but she didn't. I sighed before a tear rolled down my cheek. I quickly wiped it before grabbing my notebook. I started writing, writing everything I felt. I haven't wrote in this book for a long time.

The last time I did write in it, I had just got done cutting myself. It was when my dad first passed. A couple weeks after. I couldn't take it. I closed my book when I heard a knock on my door. "Come in." I said as I shoved the book under the pillow. 

It was my sister. "Hey." She said sadly. "Hey." I mumbled. "Billie's in my room." She said. I looked at her. "Did she get-." She cut me off. "Yea she got it, she's just staring at her phone." She said.

"She just wants to help Jay, and I get that you don't want to celebrate, but one time couldn't hurt, we're not asking you to act all happy and pretend like dad is alive. We just want you to celebrate for him, like he wanted you to." She said as she sat down.

"I just can't." I said. "Yes you can, you just don't want to. Jay of course memories are going to come back that's why they're memories, but don't you think dad would be upset if you just never celebrated?" She asked.

"I guess.." I said quietly. "So just this one time celebrate, and you won't ever have to celebrate again." She said. I nodded and looked down. "Just this once though." I said. She nodded in understanding, I'm going to go tell bil." She said. 

I nodded. A few minutes later billie came in with her head down. "I'm sorry." She whispered. She looked up and her eyes were watery. "No no, why are you apologizing." I said as I got up and hugged her. 

"I should never push you to celebrate your birthday, especially when I know what happened, I just wanted to help,  but now I realized I went to far." She said sadly as a tear rolled down her cheek.

"No baby it's ok, actually I needed someone to push me, you know to celebrate." I said. "But-." I cut her off. "No buts, thank you so much." I said and hugged her. She was tooken aback, but nonetheless hugged me back.

"So you're not mad?" She asked. "No baby not at all, I'm always bitchy around my birthday, it was never my intention to be mean." I said. "I know." She mumbled. "We should go to the park." She said. 

Later that day

Me and billie just got back from the park, and I'm now dropping her off. She doesn't want to leave though. "Baby, we have school tomorrow." I said softly. "But why can't I just stay with you and we go to school together." She whined. 

I put my hand on her thigh and gripped it a little. She shut up in a matter of seconds. "I told you about that." I said referring to her whining. "I-I'm sorry." She whispered. "Now go inside, go to sleep, and I'll come pick you up." I said.

"Ok." She said quietly as her cheeks had a dark shade of red on them. "G-Goodnight." She whispered. I got out the car and went to open her door. She got out and looked up at me when I didn't let her pass.

I pulled her into a kiss and my hands traveled down to her ass. Her arms wrapped around my neck as she moaned into the kiss. I put my leg in between hers feeling the heat from her area. I pulled away and looked at her. 

"Goodnight my love."

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A/n- Sorry I've been gone, my mental state is kicking my ass. I'm going to try and write more, but can't promise anything. Also, how should I end this story? Should they break  up or stay together? Sorry for mistakes, stay safe. Love you.!

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