Prisoner In My Own Body

Arguments

Louis and Harry escort me downstairs, careful not to touch me while I was careful hiding my freshly cut wrists. I walked to the kitchen, the two boys like shadows behind me. I sit on the bench in front of the counter, putting my arms under that last one while the boys move around in the kitchen, grabbing food here and there. Minutes later, there’s a steaming plate filled with eggs, bacon and pancakes in front of me. Liam hands me juice. I go and take a sip, but Harry stops me. He rummages through a cabinet and pulls out container of pills. He opens it and hands me one.

“Here, take it if you don’t wanna get pregnant.”

“Thanks... I guess.” I mutter before taking it with the juice. Although, I don’t touch the food. “But I’m not very hungry though.” I lie, looking away.

“Nonsense. Eat, your stomach is practically begging for it, like usual.” Niall retorts. 

They all stare at me, expecting me to eat something. Feeling very self-conscious, I grab a fork, forgetting about the cuts. Their eyes zero on my wrists, but Niall’s the first one to react.

“Soph, what is that?” He says, holding my wrist up in the light. 

“It’s nothing. Scars I made long ago.” I try to bring it back down, but his grip is firm on my arm.

“These are fresh.” He objects, his thumb pads lightly tracing each one of them, making me flinch. “Why did you start cutting?” He murmurs.

“The pain felt good...”

“That’s rubbish!” Louis cuts in, coming near Niall to look at my wrists. Harry's face is hard as he also approaches me  to look at the damages i caused to myself.

“Why do you keep making your life miserable?!?” Louis continues.

“Because all of you make me feel like shit! The way you use me for your own pleasures, it destroys me!” I yell.

“That’s not a good reason to make yourself feel more pain!” Louis protests.

“You really shouldn’t harm yourself, or you might end up in a hospital Soph.” Niall supports, a pleading look on his face.

“The thing is, I don’t care!”

“Enough!” Harry bursts. “Sophie, get in the car. We’re going shopping for furniture for your room. Louis, Niall, you’re coming along too. Two pairs of eyes apparently aren’t enough to watch little miss suicide over here.” Harry ends, grabbing my upper arm. I shrug him off.

“You decide to care about what I really want, because I’m on the verge of depression. Just great. My summer gonna be sooo exciting. I should take a trip down that lane more often.” I huff before storming out the flat, closely followed by Harry, Niall and Louis.