How Dare You [ReidxReader] - 2nd Edition

(14) An appropriate relationship between colleagues

Without opening your eyes, you have been listening to Spencer's breathing for about half an hour. It's calm and regular rhythm slowly becomes more audible as he starts to stir next to you. Carefully, you turn around to finally look at him. Even though Spencer is sleeping closer to you now, he's nevertheless making himself as small as possible. He is hugging himself, head buried deep in the cushion.

He appears to be waking up, but his face is still relaxed. His features seem soft, and the usual tension of worry isn't displayed around his eyes. His hand is resting on the mattress, next to you. It makes you want to touch it. To take it with your hand and squeeze it. To make it comfortable for him to wake up. So that he won't worry for another few minutes.

But you don't think it's appropriate. He's your friend, and it's already borderline weird that you continue to sleep in the same bed. Then again, you have a tendency to take drugs around.

Eventually, you force yourself to focus on something else than his beautiful face and sit up. You lean over and get the file out of your nightstand that has been stashed away there for almost two years now. Isaacs telling you that he is still working your case, makes you wonder if you should take a look at it again as well. Maybe, now that you have more distance to it, you can see things you could not deal with before.

Still, you cannot bare to look at the photos of yourself and quickly shuffle them to the back of the file. Then you go over the interviews, the dates, the geographical markers...Nothing.

"What are you reading?" Spencer has a nice morning voice, but him suddenly speaking startles you, nevertheless.

You clear your throat and turn your head. He's still laying on his side, but his body is more open now. The tension is back, though, and you can see the strained muscles of his jaw move.

"My case file." You tell him quietly. After a pause, you add: "I haven't checked it out for a while and thought maybe I would notice something new."

Spencer props himself up on his elbow: "But you didn't?"

You shake your head. Sighing, you put the file back in the drawer.

"I'm going to shower." You change the subject and get up, suddenly desperate to put physical distance between you and Spencer.

ɤɤɤɤ ɤɤɤɤ ɤɤɤɤ

"Seriously, did you move in together or something?" Morgan greets you.

Reid's cheeks flush. You simply answer calmly: "As we established before we're in a gang now."

Morgan leans back in his chair and squints his eyes: "I've never seen Pretty Boy next to a woman for such a long period of time."

"Maybe you should get yourself a pair of glasses." Spencer snaps at him.

"Woah." Is all Morgan can answer.

You silently offer Spencer your fist and he bumps it with his.

"Byrne, Reid, my office!" Hotchner suddenly calls from behind you.

Spencer and you whip around and shoot each other an irritated look.

You walk up to him, Spencer shuffling behind you like a child that's about to get yelled at by a parent.

"Close the door." Hotchner orders.

You and Spencer stand still in the middle of his office. "Sir." You address Hotchner.

With his arms crossed in front of his chest, he tells you: "I'd like to remind you that even though it's not explicitly forbidden, I do not condone intimate relationships between my Agents."

Spencer stares at Hotchner and then at the floor.

"What?" You ask with a loud voice.

"You heard me." Hotchner tells you with a stern look on his face.

Spencer still doesn't say anything. You take a deep breath.

"Are you saying we are not allowed to be friends?"

Hotchner's eyes dart between the two of you. Just slightly, you lean closer to Reid. That gives him the confidence to speak up: "There is no rule or handbook or anything else which advices against friendly relations between colleagues."

"Is that what this is?" He points at you.

Now he's pissing you off.

"Are you serious?" You start to raise your voice. "Maybe it's unfamiliar for you to see someone not just using Reid as a tool, but that's not on either of us."

Hotchner clenches his jaw: "Watch your tone, Agent."

You are ready to yell at him, but Spencer starts talking first: "There is no reason for you to act this hostile towards Agent Byrne. You've been picking on her from the beginning."

He's actually arguing with Hotch. Damn.

"As far as I can remember, you were the one to snap at her every chance you got." Hotchner counters. After that it's silent for a moment.

With a sigh, you offer: "How about we stop this pissing contest and get back to work?"

Hotchner stares you down for a long moment and then says: "Dismissed."

Spencer and you walk out and sit at your desks silently. Neither of you react to JJ's question about what's been going on. Apparently, they heard your loud voice down to the bullpen.

"You okay?" You eventually ask Spencer.

"Yeah. Thank you for having my back." He looks at you.

You smile: "Thanks for having mine."

ɤɤɤɤ ɤɤɤɤ ɤɤɤɤ

"Are you mad at me?" JJ suddenly asks you.

Surprised, you turn to her: "What? No! Why?"

"You seem cold."

You press the button of the coffee machine and debate how you should reply to that. Sometimes, you probably appear like that because you're hung-over slash crashing. Or because you had nightmares and didn't sleep. Or because Hotchner is getting on your nerves. Or...your eyes dart to Spencer who is sitting at his desk. Shit.

"Sorry. I did not mean to come off that way." You apologize. It's not her fault that you get insecure about your friendship with Spencer.

She nods and then asks: "Are you doing okay?"

You gulp. Somehow, you have no problem keeping up a stoic demeanor under stress, but when someone asks if you're okay, it takes all you got to not cry on the spot.

"Sure." You reply.

After a pause, JJ adds: "I'm glad you befriended Spence."

There it is. That dagger in your heart. All it took was her using a pet name.

"Thanks." You say as if that were an appropriate reply. Then you quickly grab your cup of coffee and rush back to your desk. You forgot to put in milk and sugar.

Resigned, you bear the bitter taste.