For Real | Lando Norris

𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒓𝒕𝒚-𝒇𝒊𝒗𝒆.

Ophelia

I walk to the entrance of the MTC to start an office day in preparation for the Spanish grand prix this weekend.

The internship is amazing. Lucinda is amazing at managing all the requests that are offered and picking precisely the right PR things for Lando. We had a shoot for the YouTube channel a few days ago, but I wasn't needed there so last week I had been home. Processing the Miami weekend and just hanging with my friends. We had a girls night and obviously they wanted to know how things are now with Lando.

I told them Miami had been a chaotic weekend and Lando and I couldn't be alone much. Ashley was sceptical and asked if I couldn't or wouldn't. I avoided that question but I couldn't sleep last night and started thinking again. I have to admit I avoided him a little as well. I want to make a good impression with the team and be professional. Getting caught doing the dirty wasn't the best idea in my opinion. But I haven't seen him the rest of the week either and I feel that I miss him more and more as the week progresses.

We had an amazing date and I also feel the craving for more. My heart makes little jumps every time I see him and it's safe to say I am developing major feelings for the driver. Honestly, that also scares me to death. The idea that I grow sad if I don't talk to him for three days or more is weird. I don't want to be dependent on his attention. Maybe that's also why I was a little distant. He is getting close and I still don't know if I'm ready to let my walls down completely.

My thoughts wandered off to Dylan. He screwed up my mind and vision on love. I hate him for it and frankly myself for letting him hurt me so bad. Ashley and Sabine are both talking into me that not every guy will let me fall like he did. They have been doing that for the last two years and I thought I was okay, but now Lando is in the picture and everything is getting serious, all those old fears come surfacing. It's just unfair to him, I know that and I hate myself for leading him on like this. Not telling him. But I just can't, I don't know how he will react and even with all the fear I feel I also feel affection for Lando and I don't want to risk losing him. I have been tossing and turning all night about it and concluded I need to tell him. To see if I can trust him with the darkest part of my life.

I yawn from my lack of sleep when I walk to the media department. I walk by the coffee corner to grab a cup before heading to my meeting and I see a familiar man leaning against the countertop. "Good morning, to you too." Daniel laughs at me when I need to yawn again and I quickly bury my face in my elbow.

"Just 'morning', I am still deciding if it's a good one," I mumble to him, putting the coffee machine on. "What are you doing here anyway?" It comes out a little rude, but I am just not in a good mood today.

"Meeting with the team, about my performance so far," he says absentmindedly. I look up from my coffee and see the Australian stirring his coffee with a spoon and avoiding looking at me. "That sucks, I'm sorry. Are you okay?" I stand next to him to offer a little support. I've gotten to t know Daniel a little better these last weeks and he is an amazing person, but it has been his worst season since starting driving in F1. He shrugs and puts on a smile that doesn't reach his eyes. "I'll keep fighting." I nod and we fall into silence. He nudges my shoulder, which makes me look up. "And you and Lando? How is that working out?"

I can't help the smile that comes on my face, "yeah we're okay, not many changes although we had a date." He smiles and nods at me, "I knew, he told me he was planning something." I laugh at that and shake my head. "Well it was great and he is great, but I still don't think we're officially dating."

He looks at me, "How come?" I shrug and don't give him a good answer. Because I'm shit scared and he deserves to know why, but I'm too much of a pussy to tell him. I don't say that. "Is Lando here as well?" I wonder out loud. Daniel is looking at his phone now and pushes off the counter. "I don't know but I got to head back. I see you in Barcelona." He waves as he walks away, leaving me alone in the big hallway.