poems inspired by folklore

This Is Me Trying

When I told you I loved you for the last time,

Before the curtain drapes closed on our twisted fate,

And I laid down merciless on my bed, thinking about you -

That was me trying

When I tried to call you late at night

To see why you had gone away so quickly that afternoon,

To ask you if your absence was a side-effect of my presence -

That was me trying

When I buried my head in a book, thinking it was water,

Trying to drown myself in knowledge, wondering what

It would feel like if the expectations you set on me were lowered -

That was me trying

When I attempted to keep you with useless conversation

And begged you to stay with me in my sleep, despite

Knowing that my phone will burn and overheat on me -

That was me trying

When I stepped inside that classroom to unfamiliar faces

And my fidgeting fingers fought to grab my cell phone

And text you how nervous I was without you -

That was me trying

When I borrowed a piece of cheap advice I watched on TV

To console you from a heartbreak much larger than you

And gave you endless handkerchiefs to soak your tears forever -

That was me trying

When I stopped talking to you for God knows what reason,

But every day I still spoke your glory to my friends,

Every day I still prayed to God you would never be sad again -

That was me trying

When I couldn't tell my family about losing you

Instead, I tore your pictures down from my wall

And smoked incense to ward your spirit off forever -

That was me trying

When I'm dreaming about you still,

Reminiscing every memory, relistening to every heartbeat

That still managed to stay even when you left me

When I'm still thinking about you when we're off in different worlds

And conversations are replaced with prayers that you'd meet me again

When I remember every detail, every fragment of our moments

Long after you've forgotten them

And write them down in a poem about how I lost you

And how every day I try never to forget you were ever there at all -

This is me trying.

Read more poems like this in my poetry collection "If I Can See You When I Pass Away." You can order it via https://aidanbernales.carrd.co or through my social media accounts: aidanreuel on IG and Facebook.