Memories That Won't Fade

Chapter 4

Shu-ji

I found  comfort being with Ijja. I am still adjusting because of my debut as an idol, and we got closer as she continued being a part-timer make up artist. Our company isn't that strict because we also got along with the other staffs. 

She's an easy person,  she always have that light aura that everyone around her finds it comforting. We got closer as the time pass by, maybe because we  kind of have the same culture because of our Filipino blood. 

"I'm nervous, it's our first time performing on a larger crowd."  we have a mini concert, the number of our fans our growing since our debut.

"Kaya mo 'yan! isipin mo, simula palang 'to ah. Marami pang concert na parating, and I'm sure, it'll be bigger than this!"  Ijja beamed at me

"I'll be fine right? Twilight will have a blast with the fans" I whispered. I'm really nervous right now because I have a different performance with my unit. 

"Of course! wait, I have an idea! I'll watch your performance with the unit!" she excitedly suggested

I tried to hide my smile, she knows that I'm nervous because of that.

"Can you do that?" I asked because I also like her idea. I think seeing her familiar face there watching me, will at least make me at ease. 

"Oo naman! sa unit performance lang naman eh. Babalik din ako dito agad."

"You think your presence will lessen my nervousness?" I teased her, she immediately glared at me

"Kaya ka kinakabahan eh, kasi masama ang ugali mo" 

I laughed at her rebuttal, it's non-sense.

"You'll manage to have a place in front of the stage?"

"Yes, ako na ang bahala. Just scan the crowd when you feel like you're too nervous. I'll be right there, supporting you. You'll see me through this sign." she showed me her right pinky finger

"Through what?" I asked, confused of what she's saying.

"This, I'll raise my pinky finger so you can easily see me!" she smiled widely, proud of her idea. 

"Okay, I'll find you through that" I can't hide my smile anymore. I also raised my right pinky finger and sealed our deal as if having a promise.

The concert started, and when it's time for our unit performance, I immediately scanned the crowd. There are a lot of people, and different lights are everywhere. I looked  at the crowd harder until I saw a raised hand, showing a pinky finger. 

I smiled, there she is, Akijja. Before I started singing, I felt that my heart is still beating fast, but I am 100 percent sure that it's not because I'm nervous.

"Ijja" I only managed to call her name, we were both shocked.

"Ma?" she looked at her mom

"Anak.." Tita Akira also don't know what to say.

"Ijja let me expla--"

"I don't want to talk you" 

Just five words, but it hurt me to the core. 

"Please leave, I want to talk to my mom" she lowered her head, I can't see her expression  but based on her voice, she sounds pissed. 

I don't want to leave but I'm too hurt to insist. I just assured myself that this is how Ijja acts when she's pissed. She want some time to think, and let us talk when she's already cool.

I slowly nodded.

"Please call me if you need anything" 

She didn't say anything and just let me leave without looking at me. I guess I really don't have to force myself to her. I miss her so much and I'm hurt, but she's hurting too. She fought too hard to live, she's lost because of her lost memories. I have to understand her, I have to understand our situation. 

A week passed and Ijja is ignoring me, at least she didn't ask me to leave every time I visit her. She just act as if I'm not there, and always stays in her room.

"Nag-usap na ba kayo?" Isha asked me, we are on the living room.

"No, she's ignoring me"

She sighed

"Please bear with my sister more Shu-ji. I've talked to her, she said that she's totally confused and she don't know how to talk and act in front of you"

"She don't have to worry. I am not on rush. I know, she'll gain her memories back. She don't have to force herself"

"I guess, Ijja is feeling it" Isha sighed again and smiled.

"Feeling what?"

"The connection"

"Connection?" I furrowed my brows, getting impatient, why does she have to cut her sentence?

"The connection between you two. Her memories might be lost, but her heart still recognize you"

I became silent as I listen to Isha

"I don't want to sound romantic but that's what I observed. Ijja is just confused why she's feeling it with a total stranger, convincing herself that you're just her friend even if you're obviously not."

Is it really possible? But the brain manages the heart right? It's taking the lead.

"Argh! Come on, get up"  

"What? Why?" I stood up from the couch where I'm sitting

"Talk to Ijja now"

penseven