The most groundbreaking things happen in the most seemingly insignificant moments.
I learned that when I was eight years old and my father came back from work. I had waited at the doorstep again. Back then, I was still allowed to do that.
He had opened the trunk of his car and pulled out a white ball of folds. The white ball of folds turned out to be my little brother. My mother stood behind me and started to scream all of a sudden.
Where did you get that baby from? She had yelled.
My father had slapped her across the face and told her to be quiet. That the baby was his and would be living with us from now on. That the mother of it was dead.
There was no discussion afterwards. From now on, there were just four of us. I know my mother cried some nights. Back then, I didn't understand why. Now I do.
I wasn't allowed to wait at the doorstep for my father from then on.
Now, on a regular Tuesday, it happens again. I'm sitting at the breakfast table, in the middle of an argument with Noah about whether the color orange is tolerable or not.
Spoiler alert: it's not.
"It looks like puke," I say.
"Orange comes in so many shades!", he disagrees.
"So does puke. All of them are orange."
He sighs, frustrated. "June, I think there's something wrong with your eyes. Or your soul."
"Right back at-"
I stop talking mid-sentence. Just like everybody else in the hall, actually. The two wing doors had opened, and just like that, Nikolai steps in.
It feels so strange. He had been gone for almost two weeks. His arrival should be more... I don't know. Spectacular. This is so... ordinary.
Every single conversation in the room has stopped. All eyes are glued to him. It reminds me of the time I was new here, when the exact same thing happened when he entered the room.
Nikolai doesn't seem to notice the attention he draws to himself. Or maybe he doesn't give a shit. He crosses the room in long strides, not looking at anyone. Not in his friend group. Not at Noah.
Not at me.He has reached the door on the other side of the room now, which leads to both Amy's office and Mrs. Everlance's quarters. Opens it. Steps through. Lets it fall shut behind him.
It's like the whole room let out a relieved breath simultaneously. Conversations start again, as if nothing had happened. Even Noah picks up where he left off, though he seems hesitant.
"So... back to what I was saying-"
"Noah? It's fine. Paint your room orange if you wish. I don't have the nerve to keep going with this discussion."
He shrugs and turns to Ivy, telling her about some gossip from the ball he had picked up somewhere. I'm only half listening. My mind is racing.
What do I do? Do I follow him to say hello?
No, that's too suspicious.
Why didn't he say hello?
Stupid question. We don't talk to each other in public.
He could've at least looked at me.
He probably didn't want to risk anything.
Where has he been all this time? Is he okay?I don't have an answer to that. He didn't look okay. I doubt that anyone else realized it, but I have spent so much time looking at him closely, studying his features that I know that he's paler than usual, thinner, colder.
He looks colder.
Stop being so dramatic,I tell myself. You're overthinking again. He's fine. You'll see him in second period. You can have your answers then.
YOU ARE READING
Everlance Academy
RomanceHe croaks his head and his winning expression makes me think I said something wrong, something to give him the upper hand. „So you took that as an insult, huh? Or were you rather disappointed?", the corners of his lips twitch, almost making him smil...