𝓢𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓶𝓪𝓽𝓮𝓼 | 𝔸𝕖𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕣 𝕩 ℝ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣

𝐗𝐈𝐕

I went back home. I couldn't deal with the sight of her with him any longer. I couldn't stand it. He is hers now, but why? And how? I thought Y/N and I had a good relationship. I didn't mistreat her what-so-ever. She communicated well, she would have told me if I hurt her in some way, or even if she began to grow apart from me. How could she try to act like she didn't know me?

Was she drugged? Paid? Manipulated? This wasn't her. This wasn't her at all.

But what if she just did this out of the cruelty deep down in her heart. Some sadistic part of herself was unchained after something that happened when I wasn't around. But why, out of all people, would it be me?I helped her clean, I made her soup when she was sick, I let her borrow my coats when she was very cold, I fought off hilichurls for her, I took her on picnics, I was her shoulder to cry on, I kissed her goodnight every night...

There's nothing wrong with any of this right? But I must've screwed up somewhere. This is unlike her. She would say no to any other man's advancements, keep a drink to herself, and keep an eye on her food. So there's no way no one could sneak a drug. She's smart enough to know when someone's manipulating her to do something. Although money was a worry, she would never pull a prank on me that was this bad.

So what could I have done to make her want to forget about me and want to be with another man? What did I not do? Was it her birthday? No, that's in the winter... I think? Oh God, did I miss her birthday? But even then, that's too serious of a prank just over her birthday. She would've said "We always have next year," and kiss me on the cheek. Unless if she is serious about something like that...

I don't know. But what I do know is that I need a breather. I need a break. From commissions, from defending my cottage, hanging out with friends, figuring out where my sister is.

I need a break from absolutely everything. I need a place to go. But there was nowhere else but in her arms. So, instead of going out to find Diluc or Kaeya, I sat on my bed, sobbing all night. I had nothing else better to do. Her clothes were still here, her blanket as well. I couldn't get enough of her scent. But it made me lightheaded and nauseous. Even the scent of her disgusted me, maybe I should get some fresh air, take a walk down to Windrise. No, I can't go to Windrise, he will probably be there.

But it doesn't hurt to take a walk down outside of Mondstad's gates. Windrise is rather far from here so maybe I can get distracted by a group of hilichurls or something. Some fighting could do me some good. Sulking around will just make me weaker. All I know is that I need to get outside, away from the thought of her. Yet, if I go outside, I'll see her. I'll see her face, which won't be buried in my neck for a sobbing apology. She'll probably be with that bard.

That bard used to be my friend. Now he's just a liar. That's all he ever will be to me now.

I can't go anywhere though. My home smelled of her, windrise would have Venti playing a ballads and the market square would have her selling fruits.

I was trapped in my own misery. Diluc would just say "Oh well," and allow me to burn a nice hole in my pocket to drink my sorrows away. Kaeya will bring me to one of those new speed dating events, and I'm not ready for a new girl just yet. Lisa is... Lisa. Paimon will just whine like a little baby and say how it's somehow my fault for doing something I probably didn't do. And Jean is too busy to really care.

So I open a bottle of wine from the cabinet downstairs and I press my lips against it, chugging it down. The liquid went down my throat and it went into my stomach.

I never thought I'd be drinking like this. But here I am. I need to feel something other than the urge to rip Venti's head off of his shoulders.