My Human + Oneshots

Who...

You honestly couldn't tell what was going on. Could it be another bomb or explosion?.. an earthquake? You thought it was more likely to be an explosion due to you being near the mist problematic country in the fucking world— with the most problematic people. But when it wouldn't stop you got a bit curious.

You took off your oven mits and apron after a few moments of listening to that 'grumbling noise'. What the hell was going on? Nothing like this would last like- 5.. to 10 minutes?

So after you grabbed your hatchet and attached it to your hip, you went outside.

You decided either way if you didn't find something you'd go for a walk. 'If you didn't find something' was a bit late of a thought.

When you walked around, trying to locate the noise- you found a few trees knocked over, and the 'grumbling' getting to a deafening level of volume.

So what did you do? You kept going to the noise- Great! Your stupid too-

(So am I don't worry)

You should've turned back.. but not it was too late!

You saw something.. or rather- someone you never thought you'd see in a thousand lifetimes.

You've read enough books about gods, it was just that the only one you ever thought you would see would be 'The blood god' but that was a rather common experience in the SMP lands.

Instead of it being a 'weaker' god like Foolish.. or Technoblade (which neither of them were actually weak-) you came across one of the top 4.

GeorgeHD

The top four were some of the people to control what happened on the SMP lands. Like Sapnap3D, God of havoc. DreamXD, god of control or 'life'.. he was a bitch— Mumza, god of death. You've heard that she was quite a nice one who liked humans, and fell in love with one. Then... GeorgeHD. God of the Dreamworld..

It may seem like he was weaker then the other but by Dreamworld- he was one to knock out people with 'fairy dust—' Yea no. He just had to touch you once and you would knock out faster then you could say- 'IMFASTASFUCKBOI-' and when he knocked you out? You should wish you die then and there. Because usually he'd torture people in their sleep. He wasn't a really 'nice' one.

So when you came across him, who was sleeping on the ground- and was huge? You had the right to be fearful.

You also decided that it would be better to just turn around and ignore his existence, since you really didn't want to die today- but ouch wasn't in your side now was it... because one of GeorgeHD's close 'friends' was right infront of you.

Sapnap3D.

(Do not judge me on the name- because I will take that personally-)

You instantly paled, staring up at him.

Until you noticed he wasn't looking at you, but rather looking at his partner in crime- GeorgeHD.

"Géørgë.. wãkë ûp.." He had said, sounding a but irritated.

So you took that as the opportunity to run- but you were far incorrect. You were suddenly snatched up into two.. giant hands....

This day couldn't get any worse now could it?

The giant XD mask infront of you stared into your soul.

(If you have one, sorry for the people who don't—🤩)

You were honestly frozen with fear, in the palm of his- their?... Their hand. You weren't going to make it out alive...

"Hm..? What....—" HD let out a small tired groan, looking up and pausing- seeing both of his friends standing around him.

"Whÿ thë hėłl did ÿou fàll àślęēp on MØRTÃL ŁÂŃD!?"

His voice caused you to flinch, but you weren't really alone with that action- because HD seemed taken aback.

"I fell asleep on mortal—" once he looked over to XD and saw you in their hands he froze. "Oh."

"⍜⊑? ⏁⊑⏃⏁'⌇ ⟟⏁?" XD responded, his wings spreading a small bit.

You were broken out of your trance and slightly backed up in XD's hand, which made all of their attention snap onto you. Shit.

"I-I... j-just— i- p-please let me go— I won't say anythi—"

"Śhût úp." 3D cut you off, sounding pissed.

"Don't c-cut me off." Your voice grew a bit 'tighter' sounding more irritated.

THAT got their proper attention, 3D looking a bit shocked while XD would tilt his head, looking down at you.

"That was quite unexpected."

"N-no shit... i d-didn't expect to see an idiot today and two gods who most likely want my head- one of them being said idiot."

"ÿøu lìttłe-"

"3D Hush."

"ì-!"

"3D!"

"Fîñe."

XD seemed really interested in you, but HD took you before XD could do any type of 'damage.'

"Your quite the cute mortal... aren't you?"

"...w-what?.." you seemed a little confused- looking up at him.

"It's final.. I'm keeping them."

"WHÃT!?"

"⎍⋏⟒⌖⌿⟒☊⏁⟒⎅... ⏚⎍⏁ ⍙⊑⊬?"

"Because.. they're quite the interesting mortal..."

"You can't just d-do that without my permiss-"

"I will behead you if you speak out of turn one more time."

Well that shut you up.

"And I very well can... and will... unless.. you'd like to make a simple deal..."

You stayed quiet, watching him.

"Fine- you may speak."

"I'd like to make a deal.. only if you leave me the fuck alone unless you need something or are lonely yourself—"

"..hm... that's quite a nice deal mortal... but wouldn't you like something in return for you being my mortal?"

"Not.. really.... Just normal decency and privacy... like for mental health breaks..."

"⋔⟒⋏⏁⏃⌰ ⊑⟒⏃⌰⏁⊑ ⏚⍀⟒⏃☍⌇? ⊑⎍⋔⏃⋏⌇ ⋏⟒⟒⎅ ⏁⊑⍜⌇⟒?"

"Apparently."

You look at XD, being a but confused but you shook your head- ignoring it.

"That's all I w-want..."

"...alright mortal.. deal."

He pressed a finger against your back and you felt it begin to hurt- a lot. So you quickly moved away from his finger as he let out a small snicker.

"Goodbye Mortal."

He set you down- and when you looked back up, you didn't see him. Or any of them actually-

So you set off to go back home, ignoring the pain in your back.

1020 words pog. Do you guys like this start better then the one before? Or- and how are you guys? I'm hella tired Ngl-