wrecked, itoshi sae ✓

chapter 15.

slowly you look up at him.

due to the sweat, sae's hair sticks to his forehead, a slight smile forms on your lips.

his eyes have been closed for several minutes, you see the exhaustion in his facial expression.

carefully you draw circles with your index finger on his bare chest.

his breath so calm and deep.

with your forearms propped up, you continue to study his face. his beautiful face, illuminated only by the moonlight.

slowly you remove a strand from his face, look at him as never before in love.

looks that could pierce.

carefully you move your face closer to his, give him a light kiss on the cheek.

now you put your hand carefully on it, stroking his cheek with your thumb.

"i love you," you say as softly as you can. "i love you so much." your eyes wander to his lips.

you want to kiss them, taste them, but you don't want to deprive him of sleep,nso you lay your head on his chest again.

his heartbeat suddenly beats so much faster than before.

with a sigh from your mouth, your eyes wander back to him - he's still sleeping peacefully.

soothed, you close your eyes again.

the fact that sae is with you assures you that he can't leave again, that he won't do anything stupid.

a few minutes later, this time he opens his eyes, looks down at you, before dropping his head back into the pillow.

blankly he looks at the ceiling.

you love him, he has heard that clearly.

carefully he moves away from you, gets up, puts on his bathrobe and walks towards the living room, where he takes his cigarettes out of his jacket pocket and then walks out to the terrace.

concentrated, he lights his cigarette and takes a drag of it, then exhales again, relaxed.

it's winter, but he has blocked out the cold, thinking of your words all the time.

placing his arms on cold stone he looks at the many illuminated buildings.

sae knows that he's not good for you and could not offer you what you need.

because what you really need is someone who loves you, someone who would lay the world at your feet.

and this someone is not him.

otherwise you would only be unhappy and sad all the time.

he cannot and will not destroy your future - he does not want to destroy another future.

you're so innocent, still so inexperienced of the whole life.

you don't deserve a bad guy like him, it would keep you from the good path, he thinks to himself.

but no matter what he does or how much he distances himself from you, you always come back to him, always.

how could it have come to this?

he shouldn't have enrolled in the same university.

you wouldn't have known each other, would have taken different paths and plans.

you the right way, with a good man, and he still the wrong way, without you.

but something is wrong, he thinks.