wrecked, itoshi sae ✓

chapter 18.

double update lololol, enjoy <3

exhausted, you let yourself fall onto the big white bed.

"i'm so tired. tired of going there all the time" you close your eyes.

you feel sae sneaking up on you, lying down on the bed as well - his eyes wander to you, he knows you're not asleep.

with one hand he supports his head, with the other he tries to remove the annoying strand from your face.

slowly you open your eyes, immediately looking into his beautiful eyes. just then you want to say something back, want to pat his cheek and ask him why he's so quiet. just then you want to ask him if he's thoughtful and if you rule his thoughts.

but you let it be, enjoy the silence between the two of you right now.

not a day goes by without arguing.

you constantly ask him what else he has done and why he has received so many reports, but he does not answer completely.

his lawyer already knows everything, but can't and mustn't tell you anything because of the obligation to keep quiet. the mere fact that he illegally owned a club makes him liable to prosecution for several years.

but you know that he took drugs.

maybe even still taking them.

he promised to quit and only for you.

after sae spreads light kisses on your cheek, he looks straight into your eyes - something is changed in his gaze.

"i'm sorry you have to go through so much because of me" pure goodness speaks from him, breaking the comfortable silence.

not knowing what to say back, you continue to look into his eyes, scrutinizing them as never before. you can't deny it. since you've known him, you've had to go through a lot.

sorrow and pain.

you would be lying if you said it wasn't true.

as you look into each other's eyes, sae can't help but think of how much you've changed him.

if he didn't meet the innocent sweet girl from junior high, he would still have remained the cold and heartless guy.

but you showed him that he can still feel warmth and longing. you make him happy, obviously, but still, there is a part of him that can't be happy. maybe because of his brother, because of his mother, or maybe even because of his former great love.

a warm tear runs down your cheek as you remember the lawyer's words again.

"it can be up to fifteen years in prison."

these words are burned into your head.

you could never encounter such painful words again.

not being able to see him again makes you afraid - terribly afraid.

you must somehow find a way to pay off sae's debt.

he catches your tear with his thumb, which was about to find its way down.

"i told you i could never be what you really deserve" his eyes glaze over now, but he doesn't cry, still trying to stay strong in your presence.

"stop saying that. i couldn't waste a second of my life without you. i would rather die than feel that way again," you put your hands around his neck. "we will collect this money and you will not have to go to jail. i will try everything. i promise. we're not done yet, inui. we haven't built a real future yet."