Love or hate?

head or heart?

He has a girlfriend. That should put me off... right?

However, every-time i lay eyes on him. The attachment is still there.

Its like a song that gets stuck in your head, you don't remember the full lyrics, you remember the chorus.

My chorus is his eyes, his smile, the way he laughs and makes me laugh with him.

My heart pounds every time i see him. I have to dig my nails into my hand just to stop myself from saying something.

He. Has. A. Girlfriend.

So what?

Thats my argument.

I never do anything, he never does anything back.

We flirt, we laugh, we hug.

We don't go further. I want to. Does he?

I'm always stuck in his eyes. They're like an ocean. I'm dancing along the shore, humming to a melody.

The waves crash, and i'm dragged under. I'm fighting for my life, but the melody is still shining.

He drags me under. Capturing me in his gaze. He knows what he's doing.

Even his friends tell him to make a move on him. I have to stop myself agreeing like an idiot.

I settle for a nod, smiling when i say 'he has a girlfriend'.

It makes pieces of my heart rip. Like a piece of paper crumpled under water. Slowly dragging further into the sea, maybe some with make it to the shore. Then get swept away into the wind. Maybe i can do that.

Escape his gaze. Fly to someone who isn't committed.

A sea red flags. My friends whisper in my ear as he flirts. My heart whispers, red is the colour of love. My head however is telling me to run.

Who do I listen to? Everyone around me is telling me he's wrong for me.

Why can't i just listen.

Someone who gets straight A's, and a guy who has detentions after detentions.

It will never work out, I know that.

What if i open my heart to him, and he steps on it.

By doing what he's doing to me. With another girl.

Maybe he doesn't like me and is just being nice.

Maybe it's something more.

I can't get him out of my heart. He's always there. When i close my eyes i see him. I see him telling me he finally broke up with her and he loves me.

In the wise words of cinderella: 'a dream is a wish the heart makes'

Thats all it is. A wish.

In the end, we will never know who won. But we all know who should've.

So i ask again, who do i listen to?