That evening, Minnow was restless and pacing the barn, itching to be under the cover of the night sky instead of the barn. It felt too artificial, too much like Twolegs and kittypets, not at all like forest life.
You don't live in the forest anymore, she told herself. Half of her was scolding, telling her to get used to it. But the other half of her was screaming to be free. If I'm stuck out here, I may as well get to choose where I'm stuck at!
Jay and Smokey had already settled into their nests to sleep, and Oliver had long returned to the Twoleg nest. Minnow padded quietly towards the barn entrance and poked her whiskers outside. The snow really was as high as her nose, and it was far too dry and soft to support her weight. Not feeling like trudging through it, Minnow turned her face towards the barn roof, looking at the hole Apollo used to get in and out. Sighing heavily, she made her way up, climbing strange wooden objects and cold shiny things, finally padding along a crooked beam, nearing the gap. She could see the night sky beyond, and the glittering of the stars and Silverpelt in the distance.
Pushing her way through the gap, Minnow emerged on the roof of the barn overlooking the massive Twoleg garden below. There was one light still glowing from the Twoleg nest, and the pond in the garden was frozen over and covered in snow. Only a slight dip in the white blanketed ground even gave away its presence. The air was still, and Minnow was thankful that there was no biting wind to freeze her whiskers off.
"Going somewhere?" A smooth voice came from behind Minnow, and she whipped her head around to see Apollo sitting a few tail-lengths away. Something about the way his amber eyes stood out against his dark coat was unnerving to her, especially when he was watching her.
"No," she said quickly, then backtracked. "Maybe. None of your business."
A faint gleam of amusement passed over Apollo's face, and the black tom shrugged. "Sure it's not," he agreed simply, looking away. After a long moment he added, gazing into the distance, "But if you're going for good, you should let some cat know. Jay and Smokey deserve as much."
Minnow was taken aback by his words and was speechless for a moment, thinking. What made Apollo think she was trying to leave? And so what if she did? She planned too anyways, just not tonight. She was free to go as she pleased. She didn't have to answer to any cat, not anymore. But where she thought that revelation would feel freeing, it just saddened her. The same feelings of guilt, grief, and remorse that she'd felt every day for the last two moons settled over her again, and her throat felt tight. She fought back a growl, suddenly angry, and raked her claws across the barn roof.
"If I leave right now, they'll figure it out," she growled. "I don't owe any cat anything," she added, although the words felt like a lie. Jay and Smokey had taken her in, and given her prey and shelter. But there was more than that, too. Didn't she owe RiverClan everything, after taking so much from them?
Stop it, she scolded herself again. Oh, how she wished she could just stop thinking about it! Why couldn't she leave her memories in the forest with RiverClan? Why couldn't she have stepped over the border and become a different cat, started over with a different life, with no lingering guilt and sadness for everything she'd done as a Clan cat? Why, why, why?
Minnow suddenly realized Apollo was still watching her. "You're a strange cat," he mused.
Minnow glared at him sideways but said nothing. Whatever he meant by that, she didn't care. What he thought of her didn't change what she thought of herself. She looked away from him, back towards the horizon and the forest that drew her attention. She could almost swear she heard the river bubbling in the distance, but she shoved the idea away. No, right now the river would be frozen and silent. In the sky, the moon shone big and bright; it was almost full, which meant the Clans would be gathering at Fourtrees soon. What news would there be, she wondered? Which apprentices had become warriors? Which queens had given birth to healthy kits? Which elders had passed on to StarClan? Though she hadn't been gone long, Minnow had a feeling the whole forest was changing.
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The Loner's Trial (A Shrouded Path book 2) {COMPLETE}
FanficIt has been nearly two seasons since Minnow turned her back on her warrior ancestors and left RiverClan to protect them from her curse. Living at the Twoleg farm with three other loners is an everyday struggle, and being so close to the forest means...