perfect storm

Chapter Ten | Cloud Nine

*TIME JUMP TWO MONTHS*

April 8th, 2022, 1:00 PM

Eddie and i have been hanging out constantly. the arcade, movie theater, mini golf, you name it, we've probably done it. these past two, almost three, months have felt like a dream. he makes absolutely everything fun. spring break just ended, and we spent every minute of it together. i ended up introducing him to Nancy, Jonathan, and Steve. they actually all clicked well, and we hung out during spring break together. it was really fun, and i was so happy to see Eddie make more friends. his bandmates and D&D friends were the only ones who made him feel like he belonged, and now he has us. 

we went on drives, went to fireworks shows, and concerts. it felt right. i ended up going to that Corroded Coffin concert in the city. they're actually amazing, and i loved seeing Eddie up there, playing music with his friends and being genuinely happy. i got to go backstage and formally meet the rest of the band members, and they're just like Eddie. they were great. Eddie and i have basically become best friends, constantly together and always talking if we aren't together. 

being where i am right now, i think i've fallen in love with him. 

it hurts so much. i don't want to tell him. i don't want it to backfire, and in result, end up losing him. i've never been in love before; i've never felt like i was floating every time i was around someone. but he makes life feel like a constant state of dreaming. i wake up every day happy that i know him. happy that i'll get to see him. i don't know how to combat these feelings. they swallow me whole. when i do distract myself from my thoughts, i find myself missing him. his hands, his hair, his dimples, his heart. his likes, his dislikes, his loves, his hates. he makes me feel warm on the coldest days. 

we started sleeping over each other's houses. my parents love him. he introduced me to his uncle Wayne, and he's really cool. sometimes he tells us to turn the music down when we're there, but he's nice and i can tell that he loves Eddie. at my house, we listen to my pop records and i paint his nails black. at his house, he teaches me chords on his guitar and shows me his favorite books. i love the different sides of him, the sides he doesn't show anyone else. he definitely catches me staring at him sometimes, in class, and when we hang out. i always act like i didn't just do it, but internally i get mad at myself for letting him see. if i can't fall asleep, i watch his chest rise and fall as he sleeps. he's beautiful in any state. it's distracting to the point where it's annoying. who looks this good sleeping? or stressing over a chemistry test? speaking of school, his grades have skyrocketed and i'm so proud of him. he feels in control again, and he isn't afraid to ask for help anymore. 

"Rue!" Eddie practically yells, throwing a crumpled up piece of paper at my head. i blinked hard, abruptly exiting my daydream. i looked at him. he was turned around in his seat, waving his hands. "motherfucker." i said, throwing it back at him. "i've been trying to get your attention for like a minute straight." he replied. "sorry, i was distracted." i said. 

"clearly." he rolled his eyes.

"what is it?" 

"do you wanna go thrifting again after school?"

"obviously, wanna take the bus again?" i asked, twirling my pencil in my hand. "yeah, let's walk together." he said. i nodded and he turned back around. that dumb sentence made my heart race for a second. i was excited to go thrift shopping with him again, though. i wanted to see if i could find a new top and some more jewelry. with Eddie, we could honestly be starving in the wilderness and he would make it enjoyable. and that's why i think i'm in love with this boy. 

April 8th, 2022, 2:30 PM

i left my last class and met Eddie at the courtyard exit. we walked to the bus together, laughing about some stupid shit Steve said earlier. oh yeah, we added Eddie to our groupchat and he's basically a perfect fit. they like him a lot. we stepped onto the bus and found a seat in the back. he put his bag in front of him and i saw his hands. i grabbed them both and inspected them. "your nail polish is chipping." i said, looking up at him. "they need to be repainted." he replied, rubbing one of his nails with his finger. "i'll do it the next time you come over."

a few minutes later, we got to the shopping center. the bus dropped us off and we once again entered the thrift shop, taking a cart and putting our backpacks in it. i started at the women's tops again, trying to find one i liked. after a few minutes, i picked up this gorgeous red and black lace-up top. it had black lace straps, with boning down the middle. it was perfect. i held it against my chest with my left arm and continued to look. i found a light blue and white striped button down top, perfect to throw over a bathing suit. i took that too, and then made my way over to bottoms. a black miniskirt caught my eye. it would go perfect with the first top i found. i held the top above the skirt, imaging how they would look together. 

i looked up across the store, and Eddie was at the men's jeans. i looked back to the clothes in my hands and put them in the cart. over the next ten minutes, i found some denim shorts and a light yellow flare skirt i loved. i then went to the outerwear section, finding a pale purple windbreaker that would be perfectly oversized. the small cart was already getting full, so i took it and found Eddie. he was holding two pairs of black jeans, one pair with big knee rips on both legs. how on-brand for him. i was behind him, so he didn't see me. i lightly hit him in the legs with the cart, laughing at the fact that he didn't hear me coming up behind him.

he turned around and threw one of the pairs of jeans at me playfully. "hurry the fuck up, i want to try stuff on." i said, tapping my foot loudly to annoy him. he had a few shirts and a jacket, along with the jeans. "alright, I'm ready. let's go." he said. i turned the cart around and went to the dressing rooms. we chose rooms right next to each other, just like last time. i was excited for the lace top and black skirt, so i tried those on first. both of them fit like magic, and looked amazing together. this would be a perfect concert outfit. i took the top off and put it back on the hanger, hanging it up on the hook that was on the wall. 

i kept the skirt on and slid the button down over my arms and my shoulders. i only got to button about halfway when Eddie knocked. i sighed and opened the door. "Eddie, i'm not done y-" i started to say, before he pushed open the door and came in without warning, just like fucking last time. he had one of the new shirts on and one of the pairs of jeans. he started to say something, but stopped, and just stared at me. he looked at the top, and then the skirt, slowly switching his gaze between the two. 

i realized he was staring at me, and my heart started racing again. you could probably hear it from a mile away. i had to break the silence. "so.. what do you think? i have a top that matches the skirt more, but i already tried it on-" i said in a quiet voice, until i stopped, when he started walking towards me. i backed up against the wall, not really nervous to be close to him, but nervous that he was choosing to get closer to me. he got closer until my back was against the wall and he was an inch away. he looked me in the eye, moving his stare to my lips, and then down to my shirt. was i hallucinating, or did he actually look at my lips for a second? 

my heart was beating impossibly fast at this point. he picked his hands up, took both sides of the shirt in his fingers, and started slowly buttoning it up more. he looked at me after he finished the last button, smoothing down the cotton fabric with his thumb. our faces were still an inch apart, and i could feel the warmth of his breath on my cheek. he took the strand of hair that was falling in front of my face and pushed it back behind my ear. he was towering over me, as he always does. but this time, the eye contact was too much for me. 

i broke it and looked down at the floor, trying to regulate my breathing without him noticing. he took his finger and hooked it under my chin, lightly bringing my face back to his line of sight. i breathed hard. with every exhale of mine, his gaze rapidly switched between my left and right eyes. his pupils slightly expanded, enough for me to notice. he snaked his right hand behind the back of my head, the cold metal of my Keroppi bracelet grazing my neck. Eddie softly pulled my head closer to him and he closed the gap between our lips.