dear mike wheeler | byler

mikes note

dear reader,

this is the last day i will be here. i have no specific reason as to why i decided to take my life. but it isnt anyones fault.

maybe i will blame it on just pure hatred to myself. i tried everything but everything i did just made me hate myself more.

im truly sorry. i dont want to hurt anyone, but i just couldnt take living with myself and my thoughts.

to mom and dad, thank you for caring about me, i guess. i forgive you, mom, for cheating on dad, and i forgive you, dad, for being emotionally distant towards me. i understand i wasnt the favorite.

to holly, you dont understand now, but you will in the future. im sorry you never really got to know me, but ask for stories about me from anyone mentioned, i bet they'll have crazy and amazing stories to tell.

to nancy, god, thank you for raising me when our parents didnt. you were a good sister to me, even tho we fought a lot you were always there for me when i needed to talk about boy problems. also thank you for teaching me how to do makeup. i know you taught me so when holly was old enough, i could teach her if you werent living with us anymore. i love you.

to dustin, you always knew how to brighten a room with just your smile. god, you rarely put up with my shit, and you kept me in line. i will miss you so much. dont let this keep you sad for any longer than you need to. i love you man. ur going to be someone big one day.

to lucas, you also didnt put up with my shit, and you were also not afraid to hurt my feelings, but you were also tough for the both of us when we were getting bullied. i never really learned to stand up go myself, but you were there to do it for me. i love you man.

to eleven, you made me realize that i wasnt into girls, so thank you. sorry that sounded rude. i mean, you helped me figure out my sexuality, and im grateful for that. i love you, and i wish you and max the best.

speaking of, to max, i didnt really like you at first, but you grew on me. i appreciate the patience you had with me having a hard time letting you into the party, but you ended up being one of the most important people in my short-lived life. but thank you. i love you. and don't break els heart or both hopper and will is going to hunt you down, and i will haunt you.

and best for last, the love of my life, to will, we went crazy together, like we promised, however, i went a little too crazy and now im dead. you made my day better, but im sorry i couldnt stick around for the rest of you going crazy, but hey, we went crazy together for a little while, huh? i know i have said thid to everyone in this letter, but i love you. a different kind of love than what i feel for everyone else. i have the strongest love for you. i am in love with you, even now, as i write this letter, even now that im dead. i love you will.

im out of time. never forget me. keep me in your memories.

farewell, michael wheeler