1. The Situation (edited)

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December 15th, 2009.

My mom and I went out for some gift shopping, an adventure we embark on very infrequently as she is nearly always busy with work when I’m not in school.  For as long as I can remember it’s been the three of us- my mom, my little brother Bryce, and I. Despite both she and I being very busy with our own lives, me starting my first year of high school this past fall and she as an on-call OBGYN at the local hospital, the three of us were very close and I felt very protective over my mom and brother.  I was usually busy with some sort of soccer-related or work-related training on the weekends but being so close to the holiday I had the afternoon off and my mom took full advantage of it.  I was happy to get out of the house without being compelled to do so by some outside obligation, but I couldn’t help but feel uneasy as we traipsed around the mall.  I had a feeling in the pit of my stomach that something bad was going to happen, and with my luck it would be sooner rather than later.  

On the car ride home my mom divulged that we needed to hurry home so that we can get back to the mall with my brother in time for our pictures with Santa. She had scheduled a photo session with the big man, apparently, and we needed to be back in an hour and a half with our tacky Christmas sweaters on.  We made record time getting home and mom had just enough time to spruce Bryce up enough and force him into the darling sweater my grandma had made him before she moved to Indiana a couple of years ago.  His was a lime green color, with tinsel that lined both of the sleeves and the collar of the sweater. A big red puppy dog sat next to a beautifully wrapped present felted onto the front of the shirt. I laughed every time I saw it.  My sweater of course was just as ridiculous.  My grandma had made me a red sweater with pom-pom buttons of all different colors down the front, each breast laden with Christmas lights and felted snow.  The pockets on either side of me were decorated with reindeer whose noses were a shiny silvery color that I wasn’t sure how she made stick to the shirt.  The sleeves were plain red down to the end, where a lovely emerald green lace lined the ends so that I wouldn’t have to worry about out-growing the darling thing.  It was the third year my brother and I were subject to this humiliation and I just prayed I didn’t run into any of my friends at the mall while we were there. 

The car ride to the mall was far too long and far too noisy. The freeway was at a standstill and my younger brother Bryce was begging for my attention the entire 60 minutes we were on the road. I entertained him for a while but after going through ‘iSpy’ and guessing his naked mole rat five times in a row, I gave up humoring him and turned on my iPod. We stood in line for another half hour just waiting to get the stupid picture, and once it was finally our turn Bryce pulled out a three page list of gifts he wanted from Santa. I had to laugh at that; I think every parent and child in line behind us heaved a sigh of desperation when they saw how long his list was.

On the drive home I didn’t even bother giving Bryce any of my attention; he was too excited over the possibility of getting a motorcycle for Christmas and I was too fed up with his enthusiasm to humor him. My mom tried to strike up conversation a few times, but I really wasn’t in the mood to humor her either. Ever since we left the mall the first time and that unsettling feeling began in my subconscious I was in a bad mood, anticipating what could possibly happen in the coming hours or days.  She soon gave up talking at me after she realized I had put in my headphones. All the way back to the house I couldn’t focus on any one thing. I was on edge and very twitchy, like I always acted before heading out on a mission.  It was odd though because I knew for a fact that I didn’t have an assignment to anticipate in the near future.

Michael, my agent of 4 years, who schedules all of my meetings and organizes my missions, hasn’t talked to me in over a week. I was told at the completion of my last assignment that I had a month off from government protection, but I couldn’t help anticipating that my vacation

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