Flowers & Flapjacks [THE OWL HOUSE] | A Huntlow/Winter Short Story

Chapter 1: The Biggest Challenge a Golden Guard Can Face

It's often the quiet parts of your life that feel the most wrong. It's funny; I never was very good at finding myself moments to breathe. Life moves fast when you're busy. You barely notice it going by, until you suddenly encounter that momentary respite from the clutches of time. You find yourself thinking the strangest of things. Trivial things. Not that they feel trivial in the moment, no. You'd think to yourself, "Gee, I hope Belos didn't see Flapjack today." As if Flapjack was the biggest problem in my life at that moment. As if I myself wasn't in danger every day I woke up. I'd hate myself, hate my stupid heart for feeling so fondly of him. Why should I care, I'd think, if Belos decides to kill him on a whim. One less problem, I'd think with my head. But not my heart.

I could live without one of those. They only ever get in the way.

Belos is what matters, my head would say. The blood in my veins pumps for no one but him. Every inch of my being is for Belos; a tool, I should be, for to prove myself worthy of being a Golden Guard is all I was ever born to do. It was always easy to listen to my head; it spoke mostly what I wanted to hear. The heart isn't so forgiving. When the head tells you you're happy, the heart asks you, "Are you really?" When the head gives you an order, the heart asks if you're sure you should. Whatever did I do, to deserve this torment? These questions would forever elude me.

I.

Know.

What.

I.

Am.

And then silence. And the heart would say at last, "Then why aren't you?"

A year has passed since the death of Belos. As if to prove itself a nuisance, the heart would nag at me with an unwelcome "I told you so," at every following moment. When suddenly you realize that your head-the one thing you thought you could rely on to tell the truth-was wrong the whole time, you begin to see the heart in a different light. You get all these confusing signals, like people... friends... suddenly being "there for you", whatever that means. They're here to tell you that your heart has a purpose. Well, it's one I'd still rather ignore.

The human realm is too... quiet. On the Boiling Isles there was noise everywhere. It helped to drown out the nonsense my heart would spout. To silence the little part of my head that wanted me to admit it might be right. That night, as soon as we arrived here, it didn't even feel like much had changed. The sky was loud, thundering and pouring safe rains from the heavens. I hated the feeling of rain. It didn't hurt you here, like on the Boiling Isles, but one night couldn't undo sixteen years of instinct. The feeling of danger remained. So I wanted to get inside as soon as possible. Luz's home was a wreck of sobs. A confusing mix of joy and despair. I couldn't do much but sit in the corner and let the noise of the house drown out everything I had to think about. I wanted to go to sleep, so I did. First chance I got, and nobody tried to stop me. Sleep, a perfect escape from my thoughts. I slept for a long time.

And for a long time I thought that feeling would sustain. I hoped I would find something difficult to distract me, like I found every day on the Boiling Isles. But it didn't take me long to find out it wouldn't be the case. In the human realm, you don't walk the streets knowing you could encounter ten wild animals that could kill you in ways you couldn't even imagine. In the human realm, you don't get to sit still and let distraction overcome you. You sit still, and there's peace. Quiet. Room, to think and to feel. And I hated every minute of it.

Like those brief moments of respite in the Boiling Isles-where your heart would get its only chance to tell you what it thinks, and your head would harass you with all the things you're doing wrong and all the ways your life could be instantly turned on its head-the human realm consisted of nothing but those moments. Every waking moment you feel things you don't want to, and think things you wish you didn't.