Double Sided (Toh AU) (Lumity)

Chapter 7: Gone

!~TW Atempted Suicide~!

Amity pov

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"I'll be back soon. I love you so much." was all Luz said before running out the room. "What's wrong with her?" Willow asked, I stood there stunned with what Luz said and how she acted. "I-I don't know Willow. I'm going downstairs, you coming with?" "Yea, let's go". We started to walk down the stairs to hear the door slam and see Camila crying. "Camila! What's wrong?" I asked worriedly "S-she l-left" she said through her sobs. "Who left?" Willow asked "Luz. Luz left." Camila said sadly. "What! Why?!" I said "Because... Because we had another fight." "Another?" Willow questioned. "Yes, another, her breakdown from before... it started because I yelled at her and started and argument".  'Camila is the reason Luz acted like that? But how she seems so kind'. "Ok, well where did she leave to?" I asked "She didn't say she just came down the stairs and ran out the door." Camila said wiping the tears from her face. "So she ran away? Maybe it will just be for a little bit, she might come back soon. How about we wait for a little while Maybe like an hour?" Willow suggested. "Yea... ok let's do that, good idea." Camila said relaxed. We all sat down on the couch and the others came down the stairs, "Hey guys- wait where's Luz?" Gus asked. "She left Gus." I said harshlyz "Why?" he asked "I don't know Gus". "Hey do you have food? I'm hungry." Ed said disrespectfully "Edric!" Em slaped him upside the head. 'This is gonna be fun. I hope Luz comes back soon.' 

Luz pov

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I ran out the door not daring to look back. I ran as fast as I could, I don't know where I was going but I didn't care, all I wanted to do was get away from that house. I ran for a ages, until my legs started to ache, I looked around to see were I was to no one's surprise I had no clue where I was except that it was the woods. I walked over to a nearby tree and collapsed, I put my head to my knees and started crying again. 'Why did I run away again?! I'm so weak. Why can't I just stand up for myself!?! All I do is run away!!'. I snapped out of my thoughts when I heard my phone ding, It was moms number. It read 'Hey, this is Amity, Luz are you ok It's been a while since you left. Do you know when you're coming back?'. I looked at it wondering if I should text back, I decided that I was going to text back in a little while so I could think of what to write.

~Time Skip 20 mins~

 As I sat by the tree I looked through my phone, then after getting board I put my ear buds in and played "Would Anyone Care" by Citizen Soldier (Play song). I got up to my feet, even though my legs were still hurting from running, and tried to find my way to town. 

"Would anyone notice if tonight I disappeared? Would anyone chase me... and say the words I need to hear... That I'm no burden, not so worthless."

I walked up to a clearing in the woods, hoping it would be town but to my surprise it was a river, that looked to be about 10 to 15 feet deep. It was overgrown with tall grass everywhere. I finally got to a part of the river where it was rocky so I wouldn't have to deal with the grass. I looked over the edge of the riverbank.

"Would anyone care, would anyone cry if I stepped off this ledge tonight? Would anything change? Would you all be just fine? Cause I need a reason to not throw the fight. It might just save my life. Would anyone want me... If they knew what was inside my head? Would anyone see me for the person I really am? I won't lie, so hard to hide... I've never felt worthy of love... I would give up everything I have just to feel good enough."

I started to tear up again thinking to myself 'Should I jump? Mom would probably think I just ran away again like last time. But what about Eda and King? What about the others? They probably would just move on with their lives and forget about me'. I stood up and took a step near the edge, I started to breath heavily. I looked down at the drop I closed my eyes, shuffled closer to the precipice, I put on foot out ready to fall. I started to lean forward as another ding came from my phone, I lost my balance from getting startled. I leaned backwards trying to regain my balance, but instead, I fell onto my butt. I breathed out a sigh of relief, I took my phone out of my pocket to see another text from Amity it said 'Luz are you ok?! I'm worried, are you coming home yet? Please respond'. I stopped my music and texted back 'Hey Amity, I'm ok. Umm I'm not coming home.' I got an immediate response. 'What?! You said you would be home soon' she asked 'I'm not coming home today, probably not for a couple days. I'm sorry'. 'But you said you'd be back soon! A couple days is not soon!' Amity texted quickly. 'A couple days is soon for me. I'm sorry I just can't come home.' I replied tears welling up in my eyes. 'Why!?! Please just come home, we're all worried about you'. I was getting sick of this so I decided to just call her. 'I hope I don't regret this'  I went to my contacts and pressed call.

 After 2 rings she picked up, "Hey Amity," I said "Luz! You can't just leave!" Amity said frustrated. "I can 'just leave', I'm 17, I'm almost an adult. Please don't be upset with me, I can't come home" I said sadly. "WHY! Why can't you come home Luz!? It's as simple as walking back the way you came." she said bitterly. "I can't come home because... look I just can't." I said trying to make her give up asking. "Luz come home now! You need to come home, you won't be able to be out there for long!" Amity yelled through the phone. I felt rage boil up. "Yes I will!! I've been out here for months at a time, I think a couple days will be fine!" I yelled trying to control my anger. "What?" she questioned "Yea I've been out here for a while before..." I said sadly. "Why?" Amity asked concerned "Because when stuff happened between mom and... I would run away for a while." I confessed while tears were rolling down my face. "Oh... Luz I'm so sorry. Ok, where are you can I come see you?" Amity asked. "Fine but there's one slight problem... I don't know where I am" I said looking around. Amity sighed "How do you not know where you are?" she asked sounding disappointed. "Because I just ran as fast as I could without looking where I was going. The only thing I know is I'm in a forest near a river".  "Do you know which direction to came from to get to the river?" Amity asked "Yea, why?" "Because I want you to go that way and then just stay put." she said. "Ok." I said standing up and walking to where I was originally. "Luz can I ask you something?" Amity questioned "Sure." I answered "Why did you have that breakdown in your room? Camila told me it was because she yelled at you but I wanna know why she yelled".  My expression changed from joyful to somber, "Well umm..." "Luz you don't have to tell me if you don't want to." Amity reassured. I changed the subject "Amity I'm here" "Oh ok, do you know if you ran straight from the door?" she asked. "Umm, yea I think I just ran straight for a while." I said "Ok I'm on my way". "Ok. See you in a bit..." and with that I hung up the phone "hopefully." I continued

Hey sorry for not posting for a few days. Some family things have been going on and I haven't felt the best but I finally got it up. I hope you like the chapter. (1414 words)