Balotelli-Bale Series Book#1: HELENA'S CONTRACT

Chapter 13: Reality Check

Helena's POV
"I meant to get out of bed." I spoke with difficulty. I have suffered the longest night in my life sitting beside the toilet.

Castle flattened his palm on my forehead. "You feel a little too warm. You look pale. Should I call a doctor? It's unlike you to sleep in this late."

"What time is it?" I have lost all sense of time.

"Three in the afternoon."

"Oh no! I missed several meetings!"

"Slow down. I took care of it." Castle pushed me back down. "Are you... Did he... Did it work?"

"What?"

"Are you with child?"

I suspect it. Why else would i throw up all night and through the morning? Alexander got the job done. I must be pregnant. A stupid smile graced my face. Castle expressed confusion. "I think so." All of a sudden, I don't feel so ill anymore. I have a reason to get out of bed. I'm going to have a baby!

My excitement didn't rub off on my best friend. He has supported me through all this down to helping in making the list of men who would have fathered my baby. He himself brought Alexander to me. Why wouldn't he be happy for us?

I placed my hand on top of his. "Congratulations." He forced himself to speak. He even forced a smile.

"Is there a problem?"

"There's a part of me that was hoping Alexander is shooting blanks. I hoped he would fail you."

"Why?"

"So that I can step up." His words surprised me. "Why didn't you ask me?"

"Castle, I... I didn't think that is what you wanted. You said it yourself that it's unfair for me to make a man surrender his paternal rights."

"Forget i said that." He quickly rose up from the edge of the bed. I followed trying to keep up with him.

"Why would you say it then?"

"Because I love you! Can't you see it?" He exploded. "I am in love with you! I have always been in love with you but you refuse to notice that I too can do what Alexander has done for you!"

No way! No. No. No. No. No.

He can't be in love with me!

Why the hell would he say that? I backed away from him.

"Take that back."

"I'm sorry but I can't. You had to know Helena. I can't pretend anymore. I have been hiding these feelings since we were both at Harvard. Why do you think I warned you about Franco? Why do you think I continue to stand by you even when you are unbearable? I have sacrificed a chance at having a life for you to be happy. Is it too much to ask for some compensation?"

"But I don't love you. Castle I care about you but I don't love you. How the hell am I supposed to compensa you? Listen to what you're saying! It couldn't have been you because you are around me all the time and I can't separate you from a child you have fathered!"

The hurt in his eyes was immense. It breaks my heart to deny him the only thing he has ever asked for. He does everything unconditionally. He never asks anything in return. "Do you love him?"

It's a question I have been asking myself quite often. Do I love Alexander Christos? Most probably yes. I feel something for him. "No I don't." I can't afford to hurt my friend. "It was just an arrangement."

"He is in love with you. He has professed it. He coaxed you into a marriage Helena! That worries me because no one ever convinces you to go beyond your plans. What sweet nothings did he whisper to convince you? What sorcery did he conjure to make you bend to his will?"