𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙢𝙚, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙩-𝙞𝙣𝙛𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙨𝙚𝙖𝙨 || ʲ. ʰᵒˡˡᵃⁿᵈ

_five_

          You disliked the color red.
         
          Okay no, that would be an exaggeration. The color itself wasn't what you hated. It was a color for gods' sake, there was no reason for anybody to realistically hate a color unless it reminded them of something unpleasant.
         
          And you were no exception.
         
          You didn't dislike the color red, you disliked seeing it in certain context.
         
          Red in the sails of the Inevitable was okay. Seriously, they were just sails, and they were a big part of this ship's reputation. The red in the sails of the ship weren't the ones you held issues with, nor were the flairs that you used in attracting monsters. You had no problems with Miss Merino's red hair, nor did you have any with the little jewels that Morgana had in hers.
         
          No, the ones you had issue with, were ones bathed in context.
         
          You had no problem with people having red on them, but you had one when they got it from open cuts and gaping wounds. Red in the ship was normal, but red in droplets and puddles was not. Weapons colored red were ones you couldn't care less about, but silver blades that have been tainted in them were a cause for worry.
         
          . . .finding red in the water?
         
          Gods, that was probably the worst of it all. Finding enough to taint the water red was bound to have a source, and you haven't encountered a single beast that bled that to be able to ease your mind about it. Red blood meant humans, and a single human was not capable of ever having that much.
         
          . . .
         
          Maybe you didn't dislike red necessarily, you just disliked seeing it in places it doesn't, and should never, belong to.
         
          "You good?" Your trance is broken when Maria asks from beside you, helping you set up one of the many weapons that captain Crow ordered to be taken out of storage. There was a snort, and Fen is back in your view when she walks past carrying a closed wooden crate. "She's distracted. Probably thinking too much about Jacob."
         
          "I will cut you." She only laughs louder when you finally, verbally respond to them, shaking your head as you snap the last lock into place and address Maria. "Sorry, I'm fine."
         
          "Right." She, at least, didn't seem too convinced as she drawled out her response, but shakes her head as well as she stretches with a small grunt. "Well, that's everything. It'd be a miracle if that beast survives these many weapons."
         
          "It's a miracle every day that we survive beasts in the first place." Fen jumps off a different crate that she had apparently gotten on, you leaning on the railings as you overlooked the rest of the ship. Newly furnished weapons lined the edges of the Inevitable, watching a select few get ready with spears and swords while you yourself had stocked up on bullets. Among those few was a man that was a subject of Fen's usual teasing that was targeted against you, Jacob laughing at some joke while he rewraps the bandages around his left hand.
         
          . . .
         
          Stop.
         
          "Well to be fair, at least we're not giant bumbling idiots with no way of thinking for ourselves." Maria defends as she walks off to grab a stool, setting up a joke too perfectly that you couldn't help but add, "What the fuck happened to Fen then?"
         
          You looked and saw her wielding an arrow and winding her arm back, letting it fly just enough for you to catch it with an obnoxious laugh. Many times your friend hoped to shoot at you without holding back, and many times you feared the day that she would.
         
          "Stop wasting your arrows." Despite not wanting to fall for such a stupid joke Maria still snickered amidst her scolding, getting into some conversation with Fen while you pulled out your dagger and started wiping it. It was maybe around ten in the morning, and from Miss Merino's predictions she concluded that you'd be getting a taste of that beast right before lunch. Which reminds you, that you should probably be getting to the main mast now, where you'll sit yourself as look-out and just waiting the travel out.
         
          "How's the work going on here, ladies?" Sarah's voice catches everyone's attention even before you saw her, walking up the steps to the quarterdeck with her arms behind her back. Fen raises both her thumbs and Maria salutes. "We've got everything done, just gotta wait until the thing actually shows."
         
          "Ooh, do we know what it looks like yet?" Fen adds onto your previous statement as she skips on over to you, one of the weapons you had helped set up separating the two of you as she leans on the railing as well. Sarah hums, looking off as if trying to recall. "Hmm, no, the warning letter spent so much time describing their terror, that it fails to go into any detail of what actually caused it."
         
          "Imagine if we end up slaying the wrong one," Maria jokes with a chuckle, and even Sarah laughed. "It'd be funny if it showed up right after the wrong one."
         
          "Okay you and I, have very different definitions of funny." Fen tells her as she snaps her head to her, the girl only raising her hands in mock surrender with a grin. "To each their own."
         
          "Even if it were to happen, it wouldn't matter. We'll be able to take on both." Sarah reassures, pride in her voice as she lands a hand on your shoulder and you lazily cheered. Maria and Fen were a lot more enthusiastic, and the woman shakes her head at your antics before retracting her hand and nodding. "Alright, now go on now. Best you three get to your places 'lest you get. . ." She trailed off and you could've sworn she looked at you, your face scrunching in confusion. ". . .distracted."
         
          "Sarah what does that mean." She turns and is already walking down the steps, standing up from where you were leaning and not knowing if you should follow her, "Sarah— Sarah what does that— what does that mean?! Sarah!"
         
          "What it means, you little lovestruck idiot, is to stop staring at Jacob so much!" Before you knew it Fen had thrown herself onto you with an arm wrapped tightly around your shoulder, the other grabbing an unwilling Maria by the neck who seemed way too patient for this. You clicked your tongue, ironically seeing the man in question come into view fixing his shirt and having to force yourself to look away. "Fen I have a weapon."
         
          "We all do, don't flatter yourself."
         
          It took a while, but eventually you three split up, Maria going to make sure she could supervise any needed repairs if the ship needed it and Fen climbing to the foremast where she kept watch. You stayed by the quarterdeck, being in charge of looking out the rear of the ship.
         
          The vessel was rowdy as you leaned on the railings of the back of the Inevitable, two of the set-up weapons on either side of you locked and loaded. There were opened crates right beside where you stood, and you contemplated sitting on them as you continued to wipe your already-cleaned blade.
         
          "You alright there, Cruickshank?" You almost drop your weapon when you hear the voice that belonged to the face that's unfortunately been stuck in your head since the hour you woke up this morning, clearing your throat quietly as some pathetic attempt to regain your composure before you could face him. "Why? Suddenly missing me, Holland?"
         
          "You're pretty hard to miss." He jokes, leaning on the railing beside you as you roll your eyes and bump his shoulder. At least, you tried to. This behemoth of a motherfucker was too tall for you to actually reach it. "Ouch, there goes twelve years of friendship."
         
          "Aye, I'm surprised we've lasted this long." Now he actually has to walk away when you tried to stab him, laughing before you roll your eyes, fight the smile breaking on your face, and continue wiping your blade. He returns to his spot, and another silence falls over the both of you as you overlook the relatively calm waters.
         
          His attention is quietly turned when you continued to wipe away at the jewels of your blade's handle, brow raising as he instead leans on his shoulder and looks at you. You look at him back with your own raised brow. "What's your goal here, woman? I'm pretty sure sea beast blood doesn't stay on that long."
         
          "Don't have much to do until the next one actually shows up." You say, pausing as you inspect it by turning it back and forth. It was satisfying, it's been satisfying since earlier, you just needed an excuse to do something. "Why're you here? Thought you were supposed to be getting ready to sacrifice yourself or something."
         
          "Okay we both know that if I did sacrifice myself, you'd miss me too much." You mock him quietly when he chuckles and continues, "But yeah, I suppose I'm doing the same thing as you are. Everything's already set up, we actually just need to see the bloody thing."
         
          "Amen to that."
         
          There's some sort of commotion from behind you that makes you turn your head, only noticing a moment later that it was some cheers from the main deck. You couldn't see much past the bell and whoever was on the helm, but from the voice that rings out a second later you could only assume that the captain was giving a pep talk to the rest of the hunters.
         
          "Think we should be with him there?" You ask with not much thought, now leaning backwards on the rail as Jacob is quick to follow. He gives it a moment of thought, the silence unfortunately making you listen to your own thoughts that raced with him so close. Fucking hell, standing next to him never felt this awkward until Fen came around and just slapped you with the realization that you might feel more than just platonic, familial love for him. It was infuriating. It took him until somebody shot up that familiar red flair before he responds.
         
          "Nah," He finally says after unknowingly letting you suffer long enough, voice too close to your left ear as he chuckles lowly, "I'm sure the captain doesn't need much help encouraging the rest of the ship."
         
          "Right. Yeah, of course." You say, blinking quickly and currently not knowing whether or not you wanted to be as far away from him as possible, or as close to him as much as you were humanly capable of. All you could do was awkwardly clear your throat.
         
          He doesn't comment on how you were acting as you sort of just stay there watching the ship's weird and chaotic ambience, movement from the archers set up on the masts being vague and barely noticeable with the large red sails in the way. Another round of silence falls over, before Jacob chuckles.
         
          "What's so funny?"
         
          "Nothing," He continues chuckling, shaking his head as he turns to you again. You hesitated, but you turn to him as well. "It's just, this is going to be our first trip back to Three Bridges as the complete crew again. And your first trip back since you left." You raise a brow, not exactly knowing how and why he found this amusing. "And?"
         
          "Oh don't give me that, you can't tell me that you've already forgotten about Laszlo?"
         
          . . .
         
          Almost immediately you wanted to slap him, vague memories of late nights in the tavern the crew frequented making you cringe so aggressively and involuntarily that Jacob's laugh tripled in volume.
         
          Back when you were fourteen, you and Jacob were allowed to leave the ship and accompany most of the crew to the tavern for the very first time. You weren't allowed to drink of course—you still did, but just enough to make you not feel like an outcast—because Sarah and Crow both agreed that if you were to drink young, it was best to do it in the familiar space of the ship.
         
          In your first visit there, you meet and chat up with a lad your age named Laszlo. He was nice, had soft hair and had this sort of boyish charm to him whenever he striked up a conversation. And later on, you find that he was quite the romantic, and—un—fortunately the son of the tavern's owner.
         
          He was the first taste you had into the realm of dating, and it continued long into your late teens each time you docked to meet the king and queen. It wasn't really dating, as you travelled a whole lot and your relationship didn't go as deep as it usually did like, say with Fen or Maria. There wasn't much of a friendship, and it honestly felt more like a physical relationship more than anything.
         
          You didn't mind it, he didn't say anything about it, and it continued long until you were trusted enough to drink and. . .well let's say the relationship got a lot more. . .personal, after that.
         
          Two years ago, however, you failed to tell him that you were going on a trip with captain Drakasha. And since the Poison Orchid answered to a different calling, you never really visited Three Bridges in your two year departure, so you've quite literally ghosted the guy for the better part of twenty-four months. Twenty-five, including the time you've spent back on the Inevitable without visit. Twenty-five months, where the last words you said to him were that you looked forward to seeing him again soon. Yikes.
         
          "Oh my gods."
         
          "Yup."
         
          "Oh my gods."
         
          "Uh huh."
         
          "Oh my gods Jacob I'm a terrible person."
         
          "That can be debated." You don't even pay attention to his quip when you bury your face in both your hands, blade already sheathed and cloth forgotten on the floor. Your face heats in confusion and embarrassment as you realized that you've quite literally forgotten about this guy that's essentially your first romantic partner, only momentarily being snapped out of it when Jacob puts a hand on your back. You didn't know if it was out of sympathy, pity, or because he just wanted to be a jerk about it.