8. I'm Sorry Guren... I Can't. (Angst)

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by Fray_Shinyasslut

by Fray_Shinyasslut

TW: Suicide, self-harm

Guren and Shinya have obviously had feelings for each other, for as long as they've known each other. But they weren't allowed to be together, because of their families. Shinya was a Hiiragi and Guren was an Ichinose, they had spent some time together, even if they both knew they had those feelings...

Shinya just couldn't bring himself to love. Not again. Guren couldn't understand this.

"Why can't we be together in secret we both love each other. The Hiiragi's won't find out Shinya..." Guren looked at Shinya with a saddened face.

Guren's expression broke Shinya's heart into many pieces, it would be hard to explain... "I..."

"Why do you keep pushing me away??"

Shinya remained silent.

"Shinya... Why..."

Shinya started to cry, "I... I pushed you away because I thought I wasn't good enough! You deserve so much better than me I would just make everything worse... I do for everyone... I fell in love with you even though I knew I could never have you..."

Guren remained silent this time.

"I was in my room- I held that knife to my throat I-I wanted to end it all I was going to but... I could never go through with it cause... You made me think I actually mattered." Shinya was crying, he was confessing everything here and now, it was a lot for Guren to take in. Guren just listened to Shinya. "The thought of you kept me alive... I want to die I want to so badly... But I can't I just can't..."

Guren gently grabbed Shinya's hand and held it, "You are good enough Shinya, I fell in love with you and I'm not letting you run away from me this time... I already made that mistake once, so let's hope- hope we can stay like this, together."

"I can't... Hope has only ever failed me." Shinya pulled his hand away from Guren's and stood up. "Pretending to be happy is exhausting." Shinya chuckled to himself while crying.

"Is this the end for us?" Guren asked

A moment passed. Then another. Just as the silence became too unbearable, Shinya turned to him with a smile, their expression hollowed and grey.

"Yeah, it is." He replied then without another word walked out the doors, he softly muttered. "I love you," before leaving.

When Shinya got home he decided now that he got everything off his chest he could successfully die. He grabbed a gun from his safe.

...

Sometimes, forever just doesn't last that long.