Awake My Soul ( Cole Pendery )

1. Don't let the past dictate

--in the present--

''Man'' I heard a voice. ''Why are you sitting on this bench? You should have been inside the building'' said Oscar.

''Huh? I'm just not feeling so well , okay. I had another nightmare last night and it was killing me , I couldn't sleep...maybe moving to Texas isn't always a solving way. '' I said looking down.

''You must be thankful for being alive , though. They could have killed you ''

''They should have killed me anyway. ''

''Come on , don't say that. You've been that 'grumpy dark boy' for the past two years.'' he said.

''So? ''

''You don't like anybody and no one dares to get close to you because they all look at you as if you'd be a monster. You don't look but act like one sometimes''

''I just don't want anyone around me. ''

''Not even a girrrrl?''

''Not even.'' I said directly.

''Come on , get over Cassandra ''

''I got over but who should I put trust on? Only sluts and drama queens around me..I don't wanna waste my time on this'' I said.

''You don't know when Cinderella will appear''

''No chances. Even if she appears , she won't want to be closer to me because I am having a cold heart so yeah. I don't need love , passion and those things. ''

''You do but you just don't want it to be real because of the past but you'll see'' he said petting my shoulder.

''Shut up , for God's sake..'' I said rolling my eyes.

''Come on , let's go to the course , it will be late''

''But this it's so stressful..and I hate being around hundreds of annoying people..and when I say 'annoying' , I really mean it.''

''You don't like anybody..''

My cousin is so annoying. My second year at this university is still stressful just how it was at the beginning. Everybody is lame which makes me hate being here again. Yeah , I don't like anyone , got a problem with that? It's better to be just the way I am than to be everybody's toy .

---------After time-------

''Wanna go at my house?'' Oscar asked me.

''No..''

''Why? We could play some videos games and maybe you will feel a bit better , you know i am just trying to help.''

''Oh..fine. Just because I am bored. '' I said smiling with a half of my mouth.

''Wow you smiled''

''Idiot''

We made our way to his house while I was looking at the sky , lost. I noticed that it started raining ....oh dear rain...it's been a long time...I am feeling so lost in this world....I feel like nothing's worth it because ...nothing has color so it's all black and white. Sometimes I wish I could see it in the other way : colorful .

''Here we are , wait here , I'm gonna search for all I have'' said Oscar.

''Okay...I'll just stay here and.....I don't know , look out the window, maybe rain isn't that boring. '' I said . Who am I kidding? This isn't only boring but also sad.

While looking outside the window , I noticed a big black car in this zone and no , I didn't recognize the car because I haven't seen it before. Is anyone moving here? If yes , who ? And why? Wait , why am I so curious , I shouldn't even care.