I Had Your Back | "The Moth Prince" fanfic

III. Empty rooms and lies

It had been three days since the last time Fern saw Arcade, and he felt sick. More than usual. The overwhelming fear of being discovered was eating him alive ever since his dad saw the necklace, and he hadn't dared to leave the castle. He couldn't afford to lose his one and only friend. Not when he'd finally known what it was to be loved, and be himself, and he just couldn't... he couldn't risk it all.

Missing Arcade hurt awfully bad in his chest, too, so the loneliness and stress of the whole situation had made those last few days the worst of his life. The pain of both not seeing his friend and potentially losing him was too much. He didn't know what to do. His constant headache wasn't helping, either, and Fern kept holding the necklace's charm so tight that his knuckles turned white.

In the end, the constricting longing on his chest for Arcade crushed his scared mind, and all logic was lost. He needed to see the human. Besides, his dad had not done anything during all that time, despite Fern's constant fear of waking up chained to his bed, so he figured that if he was very very careful, he could make it.

It still felt like something wasn't quite right, like there was someone behind him who disappeared every time he looked back. But he was committed to sneaking out, at least one more time. To see Arcade one more time, to play one more time... Because he didn't want a last time. He wanted an eternity, with all the strength of his heart, even if he knew that was impossible.

Fern took twenty minutes to gather the courage to get out of his room, and around an hour to get out of the castle. Every little sound made him jump, and he was paranoid with days' weight of terror on him. But he continued, he made it out, and with one last boost of adrenaline, he ran towards the forest until the leaves covered his white wings from the moonlight.

He even tried to fly so he could arrive at their spot faster. He pushed his wings to work harder, his lungs to not collapse, to not be weak and useless for once. He felt the desperation prickle at his eyes, every time jumping a little higher, yet never taking off. The most he could do was to glide, but it tired him too fast without actually saving him much time, so he gave up.

Fern had no idea how long it took him to arrive at the lake, but he felt like fainting when he finally saw the water.

He had made it.

Wheezing, and sweaty, and in pain. But he was there.

He looked around briefly, trying to catch his breath again.

He was there. But where was Arcade?

⧫ ⧫ ⧫ ⧫ ⧫

Arcade had waited. For hours. For days.

He hadn't gotten anything from it.

He knew he shouldn't be surprised anymore, with the number of times he had been abandoned like this by a friend he trusted. But he just never learned. He kept giving his heart to people, and opening up to them, and getting hurt.

On the first day, he thought that Fern wasn't able to make it. That was okay. There had been times before, when Fern had not arrived, and he explained the next day that something with magic practice had kept him busy. Arcade always smiled and told him that it was fine. But then, on the second day, Fern didn't arrive either, and Arcade had no one to smile to.

On the third day, he arrived earlier than usual, anxious, and waited until the moon was up in the sky, until not even animals would make a sound. And Fern didn't arrive. And Arcade felt alone. He had found himself someone to share his new home with, and he had already lost him, without even knowing why. So he just collapsed to the ground, behind a tree. Hugged his knees. Started crying.