7 Minutes In Heaven (AOT MESSY LOVE)

1

It was getting to be the best time of the year; the trees were colored brightly with a collage of oranges, reds, and yellows. The gentle wind would caress my cheek every so often, carrying scents of autumn rain and firewood.

This was the time of the year I felt most at peace with myself yet it was not enough to get me out of my safe space.

I look at someone like Hitch, she's got it all. Beauty, brains, and bravery. I often question my self as to why I couldn't be more like her.

Having her as a roommate and a best friend had their pros and cons. She was messy, crude, and blunt but she was also protective, easy-going, yet still pushing my boundaries for my own good. How I ended up with such a friend is beyond me but questioning it is not something I get into often or try not to, at least. I've found that when I question my blessings, I throw myself into a downward spiral; hurting myself with statements of "I'm not good enough" and "I don't deserve this".

I'm working on myself but not nearly as much as I should. How can I? Between juggling my social life, my studies, and my work, I barely have time to process how I feel most of the time.

Such is life.

"And there she is again, stuck in her head!" Snapping her fingers in my face, there stood Hitch in all her glory.

Her blonde bob was wild with waves, her green eyes held the same glimmer of chaos that they always did. She was going to hit me with either one of two things: "There's a party tonight" or "I found a date for you", both of which I was not mentally okay with.

"So, there's a party tonight-" I let out a deep, guttural groan. "Oh, come on, Shy. You didn't even stick out the last one!" I rolled my eyes, getting lost in my head, again.

"You look lonely..." A boy with too much gel in his hair and too much beer on his breath, whispered to me. My ear moistened under his pathetic attempt at flirting. Gross. "I can fix that..." it's like I heard actual brakes. I could feel my rib age rattling from laughter building up inside my body.

To save the poor boy from any further embarrassment, I whipped out my trusty sign language. I learned it back in high school and kept up with it ever since; it came in handy when I felt uncomfortable. As immoral as it may be, it saved me a lot of uncomfortable situations.

The frat scats eyes widened, fear storming any seduction they had. "I'm sorry- what? Are you- I.." I giggled some more and patted his shoulder. I signed a 'Its okay' and got up from the couch that was riddled with beer cans. I didn't have to look back to know the poor guy was so confused. His intoxication didn't help, I bet.

"I had to sign my way out- it was that bad." I said, throwing my bag over my shoulder and heading to our favorite coffee shop.

Today, I wore my long hair in the natural tendrils it usually fell in; I added some apple smelling dry shampoo to hide the neglect I'd been giving it. Though I wasn't a makeup guru or anything close to it, I tried my best with keeping up with the trends: bronzer, concealer, blush, and mascara. As much help as it may give my face, it was never enough to hide the bags underneath my eyes.

Hitch says they're proof of all the hard work I put in, but all I see is the typical introvert that's unable to give herself basic self care.

"It was Jean, wasn't it? That fucking dickwad!" When Hitch spoke, she was always so animated; waving her hands with every syllable, spit would occasionally fly out of her mouth. You'd think her being so upfront would be a turn off but Hitch had no problem reeling in dates. In the last month, she's been invited to several parties, all of them were personal invitations. "What if I told you this one was thrown by Eren?"

Kicking a rock to the side, I chuckled. "Then my answer would be hell no." Hitch groaned, slumping over.

"How are you going to complain about never getting the chance to explore your boundaries yet when an opportunity arises, the answers always no?"

It took me a few minutes and eventually walking through the coffee shops doors before I really contemplated her words. I have been a sissy when it comes to anything outside my comfort zone and it is something I've wanted to change; but is this the way to explore the waters?

We ordered our regular drinks and after getting them, we sat down at our regular table by the window. It's top was a dark, glossy wood with three names carved into it. Stella, Levi, and Petra. My eyes wandered outside the window and I sipped the earthy notes of my tea. I don't know what leaves and herbs they put in this stuff, but whatever it is, has me in a chokehold.

Outside, students passed each other by; some stopping to talk, others going about their merry way. Imagine living a life with no fear. Walking outside, not wondering what people thought of you, without putting yourself down for tripping over a rock; just simply walking about with zero insecurities and the determination to take on the world...

"Thanks-" a deep voice spoke. Not to me, but it still got my attention. My eyes glanced at the suitor the voice belonged to; of course it's Eren.

Eren Jaeger.

His dark hair was pulled into a low bun, his broad shoulders covered with a bulky leather jacket. I internally rolled my eyes; of course the bad boy wears a leather jacket. Give me a break. For as cliche as Jaeger was and is, something about the guy intrigued me. Maybe it was his enticing smell? Or maybe it was his reputation.

Jaeger was known around school for his incessant need to let a girl finish first before he completely ravages her. Apparently he knows every and all positions you can find in Sheri Winston's book Women's Anatomy of Arousal; why else would you read a book with such a title if you're not going to rearrange a woman's insides?

It's just common sense.

"See something you like?" Jaeger spoke up. It took a second before I realized he was talking to me. It felt like the entire coffee shops eyes were all on me and that alone filled me with dread. The type of dread that would turn me into a puddle and make me slither into the dirtiest sewer. Now, normally, I'd completely shut down and turn the other way but for some reason, this kid made me want to do the opposite.

"How many fanfictions did you have to read to come up with that question?" Erens eyes narrowed and his shoulders slumped forward as he leaned onto my table.

"Don't you know you're not supposed to answer a question with a question?" His voice rumbled low and his blue eyes were menacing. His smell of smoke and coffee rolled off of him in waves.

"And yet, you did the same thing." Hitch, along with myself, had eyes as wide as headlights. This new sense of confidence was fairly new to me but I'll ride this shit as long as I can. "If you're trying to be the cliche bad boy they always make 2 star Netflix movies about, then you're doing a fantastic job; but if you actually would like to be original? I suggest reading a book with more than 10 pages and without pictures." Mic. Drop.

With that, I picked up my drink and grabbed Hitches hand, walking towards the cafe door. "See you at your party, Jaeger." I shouted over my shoulder. As bad as I wanted to look behind me to see the look on his face, I held my chin high and didn't dare look back.

And in that instance, I knew, I'm going to that fucking party.